Archive for the 'Reviews' Category

Raiders Army Review: Sharks Away (Finals Week 1)

Wednesday, September 17th, 2008

Before I start the Review of the Cronulla match, I think it is very important to take a moment to step back and look at how proud of the Raiders everyone should be.
At the start of the year we started as wooden spoon favourites (shock horror). Not only did we avoid the spoon, but we managed to finish in 6th position and end up with the 2nd best attack in the league, we finished with the 2nd best home record in the league, only behind the grapple kings. A remarkable performance when we were ‘meant’ to struggle to win any games this year.

Now had we achieved 6th position with a full roster it would be an achievement to be proud of.. But we didn’t have a full roster for most of the year, Round 2- Zillman-> out for the year, Round 3-> Phil Graham out for the year, a few rounds later and we lose Lincoln Withers.. The injuries after that were consistent, rarely did we have the same side named two weeks in a row. We did manage this in the later rounds, but this was due to only having 17 players available.

By the time round 26 came along we were down to our 5th halfback option.. This side has a unique attribute to it, they don’t let anything get to them.. For one reason or another when a player was lost to the side, someone else would step in and do their job. This side will always have a dig regardless, and I think that is shown by the fact we were never blown off the park during the regular season. Even the 34-6 Brisbane loss was a lot closer that the scoreline suggested, and had a few things gone our way who knows what could have happened.

Anyway I could write all night about how proud everyone should be of the side, but words don’t do it justice. Strap yourself in for a big 2009 season..

Now to the review..

The day started off with an 11:45am meet up at the World Class facility that is the Canberra Railway station. The mood was buzzing, everyone looked pumped, there was a big turn out and KW decided to celebrate visiting Hick Town by bringing a giant straw hat. All the other regulars all turned up on time, including one of our fearless leaders who decided to extend on his image by turning up dressed as a Wisla Krakow Firm Leader.

Everyone congregated and stood back as the first big coach with toilet facilities rocked up, now the Raiders Army Assume this would be our bus, after all we had been promised a toilet… To our surprise none of our names were read out to board the bus, not to worry, I’m sure the next coach would have a toilet on board as well. After a short wait we spotted a school bus emblazoned with pink ribbons lumber in.. Surely this wasn’t our bus? Yep it was. The 57 seater was smaller than the first coach yet.

As some RA members secured some seats in the bus we realized that we had been handed the wrong bus.. This slice of bad luck was sadly an omen for what would follow throughout the day..

The trip up was fairly restrained, maybe it was to do with the fact we had our no alcohol policy in place. Now while this policy wasn’t anything new, the fact we were on a school bus with pink ribbons meant people were quite subdued. One RA member commented that the bus had a scent of gay to it.

Anyway the show had to roll in so we arrived at the Macca’s stop off point to wait 20 minutes in line to get a feed. Sadly a certain member of Raiders HQ turned down the enticing offer to shout the traveling supporters lunch. We still think it should have been put on the Raiders Credit Card and written off as a business expense.

With everyone fueled up me and KW went to get some ice so we could ensure the beverages would be at an adequate drinking temperature to this trip home. Just like the Raiders have been all season, the Raiders Army got screwed by the officials when we were controversially charged $12.75 for Ice only to go around to collect it from the Ice box and find “ICE 3 for $10” deal signs plastered all over it.. We would have the last laugh though.

So the bus rolled on and the fleet decided to take the shock option of having a detour of Wollongong. Had this happened a few months back we may have had a better time finding the place when our fleet or toragos did the LOSE stadium tour..

The Crossing of the bridge into the ‘Shire’ saw an immediate change of scenery, for the contingent who grew up in beautiful Canberra it was a reminded to just how lucky we were. Anyway I won’t bag the Shire too much as it has all been done before. I will say that I was impressed that the amount of Confederates flags and rocking chairs on porches had fallen 10%. Strangely enough migration of the locals to Texas increased by the same figure, read into that what you want.

 

As we streamed off our bus the first thing to hit us was the heat. We had left Canberra in pleasant 20 odd degree heat, which was the hottest we have had in months. Sydney was 30 and you felt it.

But there was no time for turf wars on the Cronulla beach, we had an Under 20’s side to support..

Now Toyota “stadium” has recently acquired it’s new name by building a southern Grandstand. Now from the outside it looked fairly decent, so it was a bit of a shock when entered through the “Totyota Aurion Turnstile” to find that the seating capacity is less than the bleachers on University of Canberra oval #4. Maybe I am being too harsh, Cronulla are all about the investment, if they were to sell out the Grand Stand every home game for 41 years it will pay for itself! You see this the benefit of long term planning, when you have won nothing in 41 years you don’t have to consider financial windfalls a Premiership Trophy Brings (Now that I have said this watch the sharks win the GF…)

I must say through, the new stand takes your attention away from the Family Hill. Which has a large Power line tower smack bang in the middle of it. Then again a bit of radiation never hurt anyone, right? The people of Cronulla are all model citizens aren’t they? Look I know they say it is healthy for kids to play in dirt, but I just can not conform to this idea of early exposure to radiation, the effects on the brain can turn them into someone that would vote Republican in the US election… (not that there is anything wrong with that, the Raiders Army holds no political affiliation either here or overseas).

Anyway, after admiring the beautiful ground we went over to set up camp on the South Western Hill. I must say, it is great to see the female % of the Raiders Army crack that magical 5% banner, we had a good turn out of the female demographic and it was good to see many looking stunning in their lime green.

It’s always good to catch up with the inter-state folk, it is a shame we don’t do it more often. This year has seen the Army really expand and from that a great group of people has been established.

So the job was to now focus on getting the Under 20’s over the line, this was only interrupted for the mountain walking expeditions to the bar/food facilities, at this point I regretted not bring my tent so I could set up camp for the night and attempt to reach the bar at dawn. Not to worry though, I’m sure the next upgrade will include having facilities that aren’t behind the “Grandstand”

 

 

The Under 20’s (like all 3 Grades) has been a shining light this year, they finished on top of the table and face the 8th placed Gold Coast Titans. It was with some surprise when the Titans scored the second try to race to a 12-0 lead. Was the side switched on today? Did they think this was a training run because they were at a location that was the 1976 version of Seiffert oval? Whatever it was the side needed to dig in and respond, and they did it in style. The side that had piled on points all year put on a stunning last hour of the game by piling on 8 unanswered tries on their way to a 43-12 win. I think they may have been stunned to see such a large turnout of the Raiders Army. Sadly we are only able to catch the end of their game (if that) when they play at Bruce due to contractual obligations. If any of you boys are reading this, just remember that we love you all, and should you blokes advance to the GF in the first Weekend of October you might see a pocket of green in the ground. It really has been a stunning performance by the Toyota cup side this year, runaway Minor Premiership winners and now one game from playing in the inaugural Toyota Cup Grand Final.

By about 6pm there was a massive turnout for the Raiders Army on the hill. Only sad thing was we weren’t at a real stadium where the sound can bounce off walls, being in an open field makes it very hard to get the noise to travel across the ground. If only this match was at the SFS we would have packed out two bays and the atmosphere would have been rocking. But we would have to make do with the swamp in which we were located in (ironically a swamp would later make an appearance).

For pre-match entertainment we were given the pleasure of listening to the great Shannon Noll. I’d tell you what he sung but I can’t be sure due to the loud chants of “Who Are Ya” when he got on started up, even when there was no heckling it was very hard to make out what was being said through the speakers on poles which double up as a P.A System.

By now the crowd was pumped (angry?) and Radiation Hill was packed to the rafters (which can be seen on ch:7- I better get some cash for that plug). While high up in the grand stand Greg Bird was sitting their with his manager as they enjoyed some Pure Blondes (a.k.a Replica of Exhibit A). You are going to need more than Low Carbs to use in your court case you sludge bucket.

The Boys ran out and we continued our tradition at way games of making a complete mess with confetti… Which looked far more awesome than the CSSC and their cr@ppy thundersticks (WTF???). We truly ARE the greatest supporters in the league.

 

The first set was action packed as the sharks passed the ball more than two passes wide for the first time since round 19, 2007. This resulted in our leading try scorer Adrian Purtell coming so close to nabbing an intercept and the dream start. Sadly that piece of bad luck seemed to be a sign of things to come.. Not long in and Colin Best drops a ball as the sharks score off a kick (shock horror) it’s sad to see a start like that, Best has been.. well.. one of our best all year we are really going to miss that bloke and the RA wishes him all the best at South Sydney.

Our side seems to be very nervous, and who can blame them, This is a very young side who are getting their first taste of finals footy. The sharks then go on to score another try and lead 10-0.

Midway through the half and the turning point, Campese’s ball is deemed as forward and a possible 10-6 scoreline became 14-0. It was a kick in the teeth for the boys who had fought so valiantly to get back into the match. I think the call just sums up our year though, still at half time there is still hope, if we can score first we are right back in it and score first we did. After all in the second half the side will be running to the “completed stadium” end and where the RA are located, we came back from worse then this vs Souths, the belief is still there, after all we are the group who have “BELIEVE” Printed on our back..

The second half starts and we score first, the belief is back. I won’t talk about the 2nd half too much as we all know what happened.. I was just silent at times and that silence was only interrupted by calls over the PA system aksing if people can return missing children to the ET Stand.. Quality Ground, Quality Facilities, Quality Shire Parenting. In a nutshell the 2nd half was just a case of things sadly just do not sticking as the Sharks race to a 24-4 lead with 15 on the clock.. With 12 to go the Raiders grab a converted try to bring the margin back to 14, our hope is soon evaporated though as the sharks put on a couple of tries at the end of the match to run out 36-10 winners. As the team goes around the congratulate the fans we start up the chant “We’re Proud Of You” which we are, this side has battled enormous odds to reach 6th spot and I just hope the chants travelled far enough for them to hear it, they deserve the acknowledgement..

After full time we seemed to hang around the ground for a while, maybe it was to say goodbye to some people we might not see for 5 months, maybe it is to just soak it all in and reflect on what happened that night, maybe we did because we found the site of Cronulla locals invading a pitch 20 minutes after full time and getting run down by cops hilarious… I really don’t know.

Eventually we all slowly piled onto the bus, and cracked a beverage to start reflecting on the great season we have had. I had a mate keeping me up to date with the score in the Dragons game, sadly this would all mean nothing 24 hours later..

 

The trip home started off pretty subdued as we all exited the suburbs. I guess a lot of people just needed some time to sit back and reflect.. It had been a long year and the Army had experienced a few road trips this year and they can those trips can be exhausting.

 

When the bus finally entered the highway the mood lifted, a few old classics came out and well as some new songs. Now normally our bus is pretty much all RA members so they easily understand the songs, I can only imagine what was going through those minds of those people (including kids) up the front when the Marko’s Bohemian Rhapsody was brought out… I’m guessing a combination of confusion and well confusion…

 

Unfortunately due to the lack of facilities on the bus ‘pit stops’ were required. The first one went my without a hiccup. However the second one saw an unnamed member of the RA lose a shoe after having it sucked off by a Toyota Stadium like swamp on the side of the road. With the almost pitch blackness and a tight schedule meant a Ben Taylor like search party could not be organised, the shoe was soon joined by its other half as this Member decided to reunite them by throwing it in the general direction of the first shoe. If anyone finds a pair of green shoes on a highway approximately 20 minutes outside Sutton Forest it would be much appreciated if you could send them onto the Raiders Army. Just sent them in a box care of Raiders HQ and they will pass it onto us. Whilst on shoes, RA QBN branch Leader KW had a pair of shoes and 1 sock taken off him as he climbed over a bunch of people to get to his seat. The shoes were appropriately thrown down the aisle along with 1 sock. Now the shoes have been recovered, but unfortunately a dirty sock is lurking somewhere in the bus. If Dean’s Bus Line is reading this you might want to do a sweep off the pink ribbon bus. Dirty socks and rising temperatures are not a good mix..

 

As we all laughed about the loss of the shoes we came into Sutton Forrest Macca’s. Marc Herbert and some Raiders Staff members were also there. The Herb said he would be right to go, sadly there will be no match for him to be fit for next week. It’s a shame, he was looking like a class halfback in the chances he got on the field, could have really used him on Saturday Night.

 

After a refuel at Macca’s the QBN crew went to get some bags of ice at the same place that had earlier duped us. In great RA style they returned with 3 bags of ice plus a padlock.. The ice was put to good use, but sadly me and Aimee couldn’t think of a use for the padlock, ideas like throwing it at someone and locking some seat-belts were made redundant when we stopped back and considered:

a) Injuries that could be possibly sustained

b) there was a CCTV Camera.

 

As the songs and drinks continued to flow a couple us noticed some flashed of lightning as we passed Goulburn, at first we though we were both insane. But it soon came clear that there was a big storm on the horizon, for a few minutes we thought about how this could be a result of the Hadron Collider in Switzerland and that black hole was developing that would suck us all up. The sound of Hail on our escape hatch on intensified these fears..

 

The site of Canberra Airport was a good one, it meant we were nearly home.. We all exited the bus as some piled onto awaiting rides home while others waited for taxi cab.. 15 minutes went by and there was only a handful of the 140 travelers left. The rain continued to fall as I had incredible difficulties trying to book a cab, damn voice recognition system.. My English is fine.. Fortunately another North Side inhabitant offered to split a cab he had already booked. As I handed over a Sutton Souvenir to Paul we went into the cab and were on our way home.

 

A certain Wollongong resident may or may not have received a phone call at 1:45 am which consisted of his mainly listening to random conversations/arguments. He loved it though and even got to hear a nice scream as the cab drove through a massive puddle.. The rest of the ride went smoothly as I exited the cab and thanked our great cabbie , he had to put up with a some random stuff.

 

With the Warriors pulling off the upset, everyone dealt with the fact we were out of the comp a different way. A few people headed to all bar and spent a few hours looking back on the season with Dally M lock and captain of the year and the fearless Josh Miller. I think us Raiders Fans are very fortunate in that fact the players have a lot of time for the fans, the Raiders really are a club for the people.

 

So that’s it I guess, I apologise for you having to read a review by the RA’s 4th string writer, but our rotation system meant it was my turn.

 

Lastly I will give a quick reminder that the Raiders Army will be holding a end of season meet up on Saturday the 27th of September at the lighthouse, we extend the invite to everyone to join us so we can reflect back on the brilliant season we just had. The festivities will kick off at around lunch time, Further information on this can be obtained by emailing kw@raidersarmy.com.

 

If you can’t make this event then make sure you enjoy the off season , I will see you all again in 2009.

 

BELIEVE!

 

- Marko

Raiders Army Review: WIN Stadium 13/7/2008

Tuesday, July 15th, 2008

A big thankyou to KW for writing another excellent review, enjoy!

We said Bulldogs away was good, but Dragons Away would be epic. And we weren’t far from the truth. The Rugby League gods smiled on the Raiders on Sunday, as the green made amends for last years horrific loss at WIN Stadium.

The trip was an absolute disaster to organise to be honest. After plugging the game for the best party of a month, we had nearly 40 confirmed for the trip up. Disaster struck when Countrylink pulled our bus leaving us in the lurch big time. Apparently all the buses had been booked to go see some bloke captivate a large audience. We had booked a bus for the very same purpose. The pope may have a telephone line to god; but little does he know that it’s Alan Tongue on the other end!!

The contingency plan to crank out the mighty Lyneham High Bus was put into action, with the list of tourists drastically culled down to 21. Kudos to Ernie, Nick Tits and Matt for arrange their own convoys. Come Saturday morning, I was contacted to say we couldn’t have the old girl until 11, as opposed to 830. This simply wasn’t going to work so I rang and texted like a 14 year old schoolgirl until we decided on a new plan. Fortunately, some people were too hungover to come and happily pulled the pin. We ended up with 15 bodies in 2 tarago’s, and we were set.

A belated 930 departure from QBN Maccas saw the drivers test the Tarago’s to their limit. The passengers were more than happy with the beverages on hand, James Boags Premium, much better than our regular Tooheys New or Carlton Draught cans. Despite the fact that Marko had brought along a GPS, Eric still managed to miss the Wollongong turn off from Picton Road, and then another exit. Kathy took charge, overtaking the leader and showing the way to the Five Islands.

We arrived at the Brewery only 10 minutes late, a great effort considering how late we left. Upon arrival the now world famous Mark Weary wig was met with groans of disapproval. A hardy bunch was present, but probably only half the size we were hoping for. The crew were abuzz with nervous energy, and the Dapto Draught was flowing. Rupi and his northern Raiders made a special appearance, as did Windscreens and his crew of Tuggeranong Trouble Makers.

Michael and Soulsy debated Christianity and the Catholic Church, whilst Simon got caught up in a verbal war regarding the age old Northside-Southside argument. A few photos, a few more draughts and we were on to the hill to begin the onslaught. In what seems to be a recurring nightmare, the triangle flag was denied entry and the pole confiscated until after the match. This left us with 2 flags but no poles. Awesome. Thankfully Brendan’s modified flag and Wendy’s banners made it through.

Now, the Dragons Army has been talking themselves up all week, letting us know how superior they were in all facets. Well, didn’t they cop a schooling! The RA sang loud and proud all game and could be heard quite clearly on the telecast. The commentators made several mentions of the hardy souls in the army, and even predicted an enjoyable bus trip home. They weren’t wrong. A highlight on the hill was meeting the tut’s old man, whose miserly facial hair was no match for his sons (and the RA’s favourite) merkin.

Another special highlight on the hill was the 20 or so Yankee pilgrims who joined in the frivolity. These guys were in love with the Army, and I dare say seeing us in action would be far more memorable than listening to eggs Benedict. One of them, who had gone off early and purchased a dragon’s jersey prior to the game, entertained us all when he discarded the jersey and joined in! I’ll bet there was plenty of others in red and white whishing they could do the same thing.

As is custom, the players embraced the fans after the game, especially Campo who loves QBN and the QBN Crew to death. One fan commented on how much he had embraced us, when Aimee chimed in “well so he should, he is my fiancé”. The Duke was silently heart broken.

Back at the Brewery Ernie and his family made a guest appearance, whilst Steve, Tim and Griffo attempted to sort out how they would be getting home. The spare seat in the white tarago had already been promised to poor old Sean Ferrari aka Bay 53, whose car had been badly vandalised the night before in Cronulla. As it turned out, Tim made it home, somehow squeezing aboard, but as yet I haven’t heard from Steve or Griffo.

The bus ride home was first rate, I can only speak for the silver bullet tarago, but we were belting tunes out like there was no tomorrow. A solid effort in the DJ seat by Wendy kept us going all the way back to QBN. I can remember not remembering all the words to Bohemian Rhapsody, some cold chisel classics, Paul Kelly, the screaming jets and the theme for the trip, Mr Big’s “To Be with You”.

It was a memorable trip for young James “Zip Zip’ Watson who will now be known as Lazarus after his back from the dead performance. From the gong to Pheasants Nest, we were taking odds on when he would throw his guts. He was out cold and in a bad way. At the nest, he stumbled into the toilet block, and emerged a new man. He was back in the game in a massive way, belting out tunes and entertaining the other tourists. I must also mention that he nailed 10 from 10 in the Sunday Telegraph sports poll on the way up, we were all very impressed but James, get a missus mate, fair dinkum.

A big thankyou to Eric and Kathy who volunteered to drive. As most of you will agree, driving on RA away trips is never a popular option.

Next away trip will be to Souffs at ANZ Stadium in late August. Until then, I look forward to seeing everybody at the Lighthouse and Bay 72 over the coming weeks.

BELIEVE

KW

p.s. Photos of the Epic Trip can be view at our facebook page by following the link below.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=47824&id=612293464&page=2#/group.php?gid=31781589936

Dogs Away Review, by KW.

Tuesday, June 24th, 2008

 The Dogs of Peace Tour, Saturday June 21st

Well, well, well. Bulldogs Away is always an eventful trip, but this one surely takes the cake. We had a famous Raiders victory, an Army performance un-matched for years, a plethora of A-list celebrity sightings, as well as a bloody fantastic time.

The trip started off slowly, with KW unable to locate Azz’s house in Calwell. A quick trip up the parkway (and past quite a nasty single vehicle accident) saw us at Kaleen to collect Don Juan de Marko. After nearly running the poor lad over, and copping the evil eye off old man Milinkovic (whose resemblance to Croation football coach Bilic didn’t go unnoticed) the lads were off up the Hume to create history.

Being the nice guy that he is, Marko knocked off a Sat Nav unit from his neighbours car the night before. This was used to great effect and saw us arrive in Kings Park just after midday. The person responsible for naming suburbs in Sydney must have a great sense of humour, as the only regal thing about that patch is the abandoned Donut King store. After a quick inspection of Nicks pad, and a few Brett Grogans, we were off.

After being asked by a local at the train station whether we were part of the Army reserves, the party of five were off to Homebush. It was at the Homebush Brewery that we had our first brush with celebrity. Whilst enjoying a few beverages, Canberra Identity / Raiders Board Member / all round good guy Jim Murphy dropped in for a chat. Though disappointed he didn’t have any free magnums of Passion Pop, the Army gave Jim the warm welcome he deserved. Little did we know, but in a few hours time the RA would be celebrities in their own right, being approached by punters for photo and autograph opportunities.

As shear luck would have it, a convention called “supernova” was being held in the Olympic Park precinct. We witnessed many a comic book nerd dressed to the nines run the gauntlet past the pub and its many critics. It was great to see long suffering Raiders fan Steve French aka Greeneyed in his best costume. He was dressed as some sort of gimp / clown / handy man, with his vaccum cleaner / whipper snipper in tow. He wouldn’t have looked out of place in the band Slipknot.

Our numbers grew thick and fast at the pub, with many Army regulars fronting up for battle. The QBN Crew arrived 90 minutes late, and missed happy hour when the ‘cheaps were drink’. After approximately 3 hours at the Brewery, the lads had sufficiently lubricated the throats and we were off. A few of us headed to the fictional gate D to collect some pre-bought tickets, and were rapped to see that Schapelle Corby was back in Oz and earning a decent living. Well in Schapers.

Preparing for kick-off I introduced myself to Finite and Buc Nasty, who I thought was someone’s alter ego but apparently not. I implored all the pundits who were spread out between the 2 supporter bays to congregate closer together, which 95% of them did and it made for a great gathering and looked very good on the telly. One keen observer noticed that Laurie Fischer was sitting in the bay next to us, on his Pat Malone (bar his wife).

The Bulldogs Harold Matthews and Jersey Flegg sides did a lap of honour for some reason, and provided a great oppurtuntiy for the lads to get the vocal chords in sync. A few minutes before kick off stadium security converged, but they were loving us. Obviously not Bulldogs fans, they were very happy with our numbers and noise, and seemed as though they wanted to join in. One of them in particular would have been a great addition to the Army, as he has a top voice. John Buttler’s band members must have dumped him, cause he was deadest working security at the stadium. Better than busking again I guess. We love you to John .

I won’t mention the game at all as we all know what happened there, but I must say the non-stop singing from the Army was something I had not seen or heard before. The show the players were putting on was more than matched in the stands. Kudos to all of you who were there, I think you will agree that an outstanding time was had by all.

Toward the end of the game, two Bulldogs supporters, obviously unhappy with the fact they spent there last lobster on tickets to the game, decided to have a red hot go at the Army. To our credit, we didn’t get involved and Stadium security ejected the pair before anything untoward occurred. Obviously not the brightest pair attempting to take on a 150 strong Army!

As we have become accustomed to, the players embraced the fans after the game, coming all the way to the fence to share the spoils of victory.

Upon exiting the ground, Sully thought it would be a top idea to head to the players sheds and cheer them on to the team bus. Obviously unaware that access to the sheds can only be gained by going under ground, he led us on a safari around the perimeter of the stadium. After being heavily shadowed by the fuzz, we took the opportunity to have a group shot with the boys in blue behind us. Some of them were not impressed.

As we made our way back to the Brewery, we once again saw ex-Brumbies coach Laurie Fischer, whose stalking of the Raiders / Army is becoming quite disturbing. If you want in Laurie, just come sit with us buddy! Not sure if he was ecstatic when someone mentioned in passing how great it was to see a team from Canberra finally win.

Upon arriving back at the pub, we were cordially advised to pipe down, as our singing was drowning out the live band. After a few at the Brewery, and listening to The Gambler on repeat, we posed for photos with starry eyed punters, and then said our good byes. Back at Nicks place, he entertained us with stories, such as his and Katie’s first date, where he took her out to the local servo and bought her a meat pie. Who said romance is dead?

Trying to get a pizza at half midnight proved to be a struggle, as did getting Azz to share his BBQ meat lovers. After Peter Garrett and his mob had done a runner, Marko was the first to crash. Why he decided to squash himself into the spare room around an unused desk I will never know.

Just when we thought the night was over, Tom received a call from Rupi, a Sydney based RA member who was looking for a party. Ten minutes later he arrived to find everyone asleep bar Tom and KW. By this stage, my brain wasn’t functioning too well, but I do recall him talking about a nightclub near Wynyard where you need to wear a suit to get in, as well as the fact he had a soccer game on at 9am.

Next official Raiders Army trip is via bus to Wollongong, where we meet the Dragons. Any and all interested in attending this game should drop me an email or keep your eye on the GreenHouse forum.

BELIEVE

KW

* On another note we are currently have some trouble uploading photos to this site. We do however have a facebook group where we try to upload photos on a regualar basis. To view these photos simply join our facebook group by visiting the Link Below.

Raiders Army Facebook Group

Raiders Army Review: Round 2

Monday, March 24th, 2008

Penriff Beachside Tour

By Nick Townsend

After a piss poor showing in round 1 on the paddock, there was a lot of anticipation about the round 2 game against Penrith. Both sides were terrible the previous week and keen to bounce back. With a good showing from the Raiders Army in round 1, those able to make it were keen to keep the momentum going for round 2, but the challenge would be made difficult by the lack of regulars due to Easter long weekend.

Far from 100% after a Good Friday mishap on the booze, I was confident of a good showing on and off the pitch and set out for a big day and night at about Midday, Picking up GH member Peter Garrett on my way, we donned our green and headed to Panthers for some pre drinks. We met up with RA regular Souls 04 in the sports bar along with some ring-in’s i brought along from St Clair.

After a few rounds…2 or 3… maybe 10. We slowly made our way over to CUA stadium, most of us nicely toasted and keen to cheer on the mighty Green Machine in a mouth watering clash of two big guns of the U/20’s Toyota Cup. It didn’t take long for security to become very watchful on the Army. Which could have had something to do with the immediate berating of the Penrith U/20’s winger.

The Army was impressed with the CUA facilities, the pies were hot, the beer and bourbons were full strength and to my surprise, the vodka and cokes were flowing. In stark contrast to the shipping containers and construction sites that greeted us at Newcastle.

The numbers continues to pour in, with Greenheart and his mates coming in and Toby not far behind, ready and able to lend their voices to the cause. Along with GCR and Pickle, some reminiscing of Mad Monday was had and some very dubious remarks made by GCR about my actions that night. Apparently some of which I still have no knowledge of.

We found some voice early to help rally the U/20’s to a stellar performance over the highly ranked Panthers. Moruya local Butters was over joyed by the performance of Jared Kennedy, a home town hero for Butters. Big props also to Mick Picker, Brock Dunn and Josh Dugan who were stand outs in a very good team performance. Well done lads.

During the U/20’s the numbers were slowly building, a bus load of fans from Canberra came up. We hadn’t seen them before but they were there in numbers, and boy did we need them. Shortly after Wizmor and Believer turned up to add more numbers and a touch of class to the hill.

By the time FG rolled around the numbers of random’s had swelled nicely and we had a solid group of 30+ strong. All keen to sing their hearts out for the lads. I gathered Souls and Toby, and we started getting the Army condensed, and distributing confetti.

KICK-OFF… and some bad news early with Logan being put on report and Penrith going to a 2-nil lead, but this was not to stay this way, as with our next touch of the ball, Zillman split the panthers from the back and raced 80 metres to score almost untouched, sending the fans on the hill into a frenzy.

Three minutes later and we were all at the disco! I started the obligatory “2 f’s in penriff”, which being a Penrith local, I copped a few raised eye brows about.…

A beautiful backline movement, set up by another clean bust from Zillman, saw Bronx Goodwin go in near the sticks. The Army had found their voice, and gleefully informed the Penriff faithful they had “the worst coach in the league” and if my eyes did not deceive me I believe when we went for a 2nd chorus, we were joined by some disgruntled Penrith fans. 12-2 to the boys in green.

But the game then shifted momentum on the back of some ordinary Raiders play combined with Willy Zillman going off with an injury… which now appears to be an ACL and the end of his season, on behalf of the RA, id like to say we’re all gutted for you Zilly and all the best for a speedy recovery and we look forward to cheering you on when you come back!

Jared Sammut inspired the Panthers to a half time lead of 16-12 with a 40-20 which led to the Brad Tighe try and some very good ball playing to put Rhys Wesser in for 4 pointer. On the stroke of halftime TC potted a penalty goal to get the difference back to 2.

The second half was a grinding and very tense affair, the Panthers continued to surrender possession and the Raiders couldn’t find the line. With exception to a nice backline play that saw everywhere man Marshall Chalk cross out wide. Todd Carney converted beautifully to put the score to 20-16.

The final 20 minutes were absolutely nail biting stuff, I gathered the Raiders Army regulars and decided we’d do all we could to inspire these lads to victory, Soulsy led us off with an “Every where we go” and a big burly man at the front took some lead and got some solid Raiders chants going. The Army were pumped and in fine voice… our voices were struggling but we were determined to do our part.

Finally after some tense moments, including the last scrum, the full time whistle blew. Much to the delight of Butters who had completely lost his mind by this point, and im not ashamed to say i was spotted with my hands together looking at the skies, praying to the football gods. And the hill erupted into random hugs, cheers and hi fives. The Army rushed the fence and the lads were all too happy to oblige. Bronx Goodwin was first over the fence and was greeted by a wall of exuberant Raiders fans, followed by the rest of the squad. Captain courageous, Alan Tongue was last. Some scattered chants went up but at this point, the euphoria of a win had left us with zero collaboration. The job was done.

The Army slowly departed the ground with promises of a good back up for Canberra V Dragons next week, but most of all a sense of relief! Our 2008 season was under way.

Just like to say a big thanks to all the girls and boys who showed up on the hill and sang their hearts out for the boys. I look forward to seeing you all again soon. Toby and Souls did a fantastic job firing the crowd up and keeping them all in fine voice.

A reminder to make sure you’re all booked in for Round 9 V Roosters, it is a must be at game! Until next time…Go the Raiders! Believe!

Cheers
Nick

Raiders Army Review - Round 1

Thursday, March 20th, 2008

By Paul Henson


Welcome to another year of Raiders Army reviews. The review is designed to provide our loyal base of avid readers with a lighthearted insight into the thrills and spills of away trips with the Raiders Army. Loz is working on her acting skills to perform the thrills and spills piece later in the year. Unfortunately over enthusiasm contributed to a round 1 injury.

The first away trip for the season is always met with excitement, anticipation, expectation, nerves and usually a large quantity of booze. This trip was to be no exception. We met early on Saturday morning at Queanbeyan Macca’s. There were 2 reasons for this location, firstly to provide a meeting spot that could provide some hangover food for those like myself who enjoyed the first Friday Night Footy for the year, secondly to prepare us for Newcastle later that evening. Somehow Newcastle ended up making Queanbeyan look like Dubai, but more on that later. There were a few newbie’s making their Army debuts in 2008. Rick James had been looking forward to this trip immensely, he even bought a merkin for the occasion and stuck it on his chin. Wendus was having her first trip away, as was Chopsueu and a couple of his mates also in year 9. Willy Orwonti and Brett the driver were also experiencing their first trip and lined up in the front row.

After a quick bite and a headcount it was on the road in the famous Lyneham High bus. This season the bus has done a Brandon Pearson/Costin and reverted to its maiden name, Playmate. This was its only change in the offseason though, and it soon became very clear that it didn’t do any sprint training over the break. We were in for a long haul. The first leg of the trip ran smoothly all the way to Sutton Forest, the ‘no beer till Sydney’ policy was out in force and being observed to the letter. This was a coincidence because there was also no pit stops that the RA are famous for, as they thanklessly attempt to help drought affected farmers all around Australia. A bit of a stop at Sutton and off to Sydney it was.

First priority with the bus faithful was finding somewhere for beverages. Our old pal Ben ‘Metways’ suggested Camden so we headed in that direction as it was first turn off. 5 minutes later and we are lost in deep Western Sydney with no idea where we were. We saw fibro shacks, abandoned cars, a soil mill and mortgage stress, among other things as we commented that it was definitely ‘bandit country’. Little did we know we’d see worse places later in the evening. Eventually we found the shops after a nice tour in display home country. The refreshments were purchased, Simon complained, then it was onto Terrigal courtesy of all sorts of roads that sound like they were named by computer nerds eg F3, M7.

So we arrive at the accommodation. Most people are more interested where the esky is rather than their bag. Telling people to set up their airbeds fell on deaf ears and within halfa we were over at the club sampling their finest cognacs and Moet. KW’s slush fund for petrol contributed a round much to the glee of the punters. A few more and we were on the road.
The bus ride to Newcastle was great. The singing intensified and everyone was joining in. Some old favourites came out and we were all getting pumped for the game. There was no shortage of excitement, however time was running out. We arrived right on kick off and joined the Sydney boys who had reserved a spot on the hill. The players were running out so we started our singing right away.

Within 20 seconds ‘Needles’ MacDougall had made a bust and I thought we were in for a long night. Defence held firm though. Shortly after Linc barged over and I thought this was the start of the new Raiders, the one with steely resolve that wouldn’t back down no matter where they played. 10 minutes later ‘Wes the driving force Naquirma’ stretched out for a try. They went to the video ref and the Knights fans around me groaned and whinged that checking it was pointless and just slowing up proceedings. They were most shocked when it was awarded, I would have abused the idiot in the box had my jaw not been on the ground. Interesting that the definition of downward pressure changes from year to year. See last year within 2 metres of where the try was awarded, Alan Tongue had a try ruled against him when he got more purchase on the ball and downward pressure than Wes! I wrote it off as bad luck. 5 minutes later old mate Needles got a case of roid rage and pegged the ball 2 metres forward at the touchie. The winger somehow latched onto the ball to score and the Knights were a try in front. It was at this point a flea ridden local thought using the RA triangle flag to celebrate would be ‘bonza’. He was last seen being led to the dibby van for an evening with a roof over his head, he must’ve thought he hit the jackpot. Halftime was upon us in no time. I took the chance to grab a beer and chat to a few locals. One or two locals were friendly, some were abusive, but most were simply incoherent. One very smart fella remarked “They see me rollin, they be hatin, be patrollin, and tryna catch me dirty ridin”….who was I to argue.

Time for the 2nd half. Our ball control was rubbish to say the least. My constant ranting to get to the kick was falling on deaf ears, namely the 80 year old women down the front who all suffer from Tourette’s. The Knights scored off a bomb and then again from a grubber bouncing off the post. Hot Rod Todd laid on 2 tries to give us hope. From the kick off we made an error, the Knights scored and it was game over. I expected guns to be fired into the air, maybe there was but I didn’t hear it over the shouts of ‘Yee-haw’. The only other point of note from the ground was a female Knights fan advising KW she was offended by him scratching a certain part of his anatomy. She gave him some advice on how to fix it and obviously had some experience with various itches. We packed up our gear and headed out of the ground past the shipping containers being passed off as ‘corporate boxes’ and insults from those inside, many of those looked as if they may have been used to the 5 x 5 square confines. We shuffled back to the bus disappointed at the opening round loss but most still found a lot of positives.

The trip home was a long one. We needed to find some food in a hurry, some could say we lit the road up. A pit stop at the Colonel and off to Terrigal for the evening. Some of the boys on the bus spent the time pegging stuff at each other and trash talking, most were just either trying to avoid the missiles or collecting their thoughts from round 1. We had made one tragic mistake though, and arrived home at midnight with no commiseration drinks to see us through, this meant the adrenalin of the 1st trip of the year was to be the thing to keep most people awake and alive. Some even went for a walk to stay up, Loz inspected the landscaping and Willy Orwonti made a white tea with 2 salts. I decided I’d had my lot and went to bed.

I woke up the next morning to some tired Raiders faithful, most had had about 4 hours sleep. There were stories of late night antics such as deflating people’s airbeds, more trash talk on the balcony and bushwalking. We fixed the fence where Loz pushed it over, had a famous Simon BBQ brekky, then headed back to the home of the mighty Raiders.
On the way home we once again stopped at Camden, but this time we got it right without driving round in circles like Clarke Griswald. Halfway home we also stopped at Sutton and kicked the footy with as much grace as Brad Drew. We then headed towards the Nations Capital. A strategically planned plant watering by KW near a turning bay allowed enough time for those on the bus with the iron stomach’s to talk the driver into backtracking 10 minutes up the Hume to Goulburn for another case of loudmouth soup. The front half of the bus was elated, the ‘boys’ at the back near me were furious…..after all they had a quilt to finish knitting at home and a rocking chair that was losing momentum. Mostly we thought it was only appropriate that we at least tried to buy a few drinks and a bunch of flowers for Mrs Carney if she introduced herself. The Big Man may have appeared angry but at least he got to look for a car. After stocking up the bus, it was full steam to Queanbeyan. We arrived, stretched our legs and farewelled the Playmate knowing that we’d meet again sometime soon. Some shook hands, some hugged, others just kept trying to get the sand out of their Reg Grundies. All in all everyone agreed it had been a great trip despite the result and were happy the footy was back again for another year.

This week the Raiders play Penrith away at the beach. Although no RA bus was arranged this week due to numerous Easter commitments, there should be a solid turnout on the hill at Penrith. If you get the chance I urge you to join Nick, Toby and the other Sydney boys on the hill to sing our songs and spread the word. The cobwebs have been removed and now it is time to get some points on the ladder.

Till next time…..BELIEVE!

Review - Bulldogs Away - 2007

Thursday, August 30th, 2007

Hi Everyone,

Firstly, apologies for the lateness. I’ve been in hospital with a coma ever since Greaeme West decided to rip our boys off last weekend. Where to start? Bulldogs away was designed to be our swansong away trip for 2007, and it turned out to be possibly the best trip ever.

Raiders Army favourites, The Nightmare and Big Si made their long awaite return to the Hume Highway hit squad. This time, due to the unceremonious withdrawral of our last bus company, RA newcomer KW supplied us with the old Lyneham High bus, complete with Queanbeyaners. Kudos, KW. Well in.

In typical fashion, the Queanbeyan guys were around an hour late, but the Canberra crew had planned for this by telling them to arrive an hour earlier than we atually meant. Once on board the bus, beverages were consumed and we were on our way to Sydney — At around 60 km/h — This thing was bloody slow. The only thing slower is when you sing ‘Who Ate All The Pies’ to a Tigers supporter and you’re waiting for a response. This didn’t dampen our spirits, because it gave us an opportunity to get to know the QBN people, the newest additions to our group.

Naturally, the first stop was a rest stop just outside Goulburn. Frank the Tank was full and needed a refresher, so we stopped for a breather. While I was busy contracting tetanus from a piece of metal protruding from the toilet, Frank was busy stepping on soiled toilet paper, possibly his own. He walked out like this, where Big Si proclaimed that he’d seen kites with shorter tails. The bus was held up for 10 minutes because we couldn’t pick ourselves up off the ground from all the laughter.

Back on the road, the laughter continued all the way past Marulan. We played various games to amuse ourselves, one, an overtaking competition with a far superior bus. It was a race to see who could stay over 60 km/h going up hill. The passengers of the other bus, obviously international tourists, were fascinated with Australian supporting culture. One tourist was even spotted looking up the Army in their encyclopaedia.

Many more toilet stops were had along the way and as we got closer to Stadium Australia, we could sense that the boys in Green may pull through today…

We arrived at the ground, more bouyant than we’d been all season, and after a quick safety talk from the Nightmare, we were out, and singing our way into the ground. At this point, i’d like to comment on the behaviour of the Bulldogs crowd. All the public shaming they get is unwarranted. All bulldogs fans we saw were friendly, and even approached us to say how good it was seeing people supprt their team. This is a far cry from The Tigers fans in Campbelltown, who pick fights with you as you leave, or the worst fans in the NRL, Manly. While at Manly in round one, we were pelted with half full cans of beer. The security at the ground was absolutely abominable, as was the police presence. Neither organisation came to our aid until it was too late. Shame, Manly.

But I digress, We invited as many Raiders fans as possible to sit with us in Bay 113. Unfortunately, we couldn’t bring out big flags because Telstra Stadium thinks that people will get killed in a pool pole massacre or something, so we came with our voices. We sang, right up to the Raiders first try, after which it became a bit depressing. Credit to all the Raiders Army people, when one person got a bit down at teh scoreline, another would tap them on the back and get them going again. This is what it’s all about, we support the team during the tougher times and it makes the good times all the sweeter.

After Sonny Bill Williams had finished owning our boys, he was subbed off on our side of the field, so we chimed in with the ‘Take a piss’ chant, to which he just pointed at the scoreboard. Fair play champ. While Sydney papers lambasted us for our chant, I’m sure Sonny Bill was only worried about us for a nano-second, and more worried at why the papers were suddenly behind him rather than against him. What the Sydney papers failed to mention was that everyone in our bay stood to applauf as Hasem El Masri kicked past 2000 career points. I say again, Well in champ.

So, our boys got smoked. I dare say it would have been a different story had SBW been injured. It’s been a tough year, but our guys have gone very well considering their experience. The Army is glad to see the back of Matt Elliott — Look what he’s done at Penrith Beach — and we’re really glad to have Neil Henry, who suggested that the players all put money in a bucket to pay for the travel costs of the fans who went up to see the game.

All in all, it’s been an indifferent year. We’ve really struggled for numbers, which has made the Army’s performances a bit wanting, but if you’re keen to get in there and support your team vocally, or wave the big flags, come and see us in bay 72 this Saturday and sing our boys home.

This team will win a premiership.

Until 2008 - BELIEVE

Raiders Army Review: South Sydney Round 9

Monday, May 14th, 2007

Glory Glory to the Raiders…

It may not have been our best performance of the year, but it was gutsy. For 8 Rounds of the NRL we have struggled to hold teams to under 20 points. Last night we only let in 1 try. Anyway I’m sure everyone here wants to read about the trip as there are 1000 match reports out there.

The day started at around 3pm for me, where I watched KW go around in his division 7 Soccer Match at the UC. After what felt like an eternity, half time was finally blown and we met up with 4 other people and headed for Sydney. With beers in the esky we were on our way. The trip up seemed to go so quickly, I guess that was due to the fact we only had a 5 minute stop to grab some microwavable servo dinner and the trip being full of good fun conversation. The best one would have to be when we passed a hertz mini bus with other Raiders supporters, now it was quite clear they were also off to Telstra, so we just gave them the standard cheer and honk of the horn. However, it wasn’t as clear for 1 bloke who finally realised half an hour later when he exclaimed “They are going to the bunnies match for sure”. It is good to see that we have a potential detective within our ranks!

After quickly manoeuvring through Sydney we reached our destination, Telstra Stadium. I guess the good thing about Souths having such a big home Ground is the fact you can easily find a park. So after making a mental note of where we parked, we enter the stadium only to realise we need to be all the way round the other side! That’s one of the crap things about Telstra, you have to enter through certain gates. After a short hike we finally reached our seats. I must say it was quite good to see a pretty decent turnout of Raiders fans, Telstra Stadium is not the best place to watch footy, and we were coming off a shocking 2nd half performance vs. Manly. So well done!

7:30 arrived and there was hardly anyone in the ground, Russell Crowe’s huge PR campaign had obviously paid dividends…

The boys run out to a near empty stadium with the ground announcer trying to get fans to remind the Raiders that they are in Sydney, and to their credit the Souths fans reminded us that this is Sydney by having the stadium at minimal capacity just for us.

The game is underway and we are the better side early on with Both Carney and Goodwin coming close to scoring the opener. Sadly it’s those damn Bunnies who cross the line first through that bald headed hack Hegarty. By this point we are turning over a lot of possession, but somehow Souths can’t seem to put on any more points. Todd Carney misses a penalty goal right as the half wraps up, but it isn’t all bad as to go 6-0 down at half time is alright as we are still in striking distance.

Half time means a quick food run, the food itself looked pretty good so I grabbed a cheeseburger and some fries for the very “affordable” sum of around $200. I thought Canberra stadium food was dodgy, well Telstra took it to a whole new level. I couldn’t even finish the whole cheeseburger without dry wretching despite being incredibly hungry, and the hot chips weren’t that much better either.

After the short break the second half gets underway, and it’s not long before Campo breaks the line to put Milne in the clear. He scores under the posts and makes Peachey look like a complete clown at the same time. The bloke really has some speed in him and can find the white line when he needs to, and I mean the good white line not the Wendell Sailor type.

But in true Raiders style, after this try we go back to our trademark of turning over the ball and taking poor options. Souths get a penalty and take the 2. Not long after they get another penalty within kicking distance, but instead of trying to put us to the sword they take a further 2 points… I still cannot see the logic in this. We already had to score a try to win, now we can still win with a try, so the ultra conservative Rabbitohs plot themselves 4 ahead to the Massive roar of the Burrow/The Singers End. I think they are two seperate groups these days? A shame really, they would be huge if they combined.

I think the fact that the Bunnies didn’t have the balls to risk 2 points to gain lifted us, and I could sense an ‘upset’ occurring. So who else but our wonder boy from Goulburn Todd Carney would go over to put us in front by two after some great work from the Origin-bound Neville Costigan (that’s right I’m calling it).

But the job was not done yet as we still had to hold on for the win. Thankfully Neil Henry is our Coach now so we pushed for that extra try instead of trying control the tempo. This came through future Canberra Chief Minister Alan Tongue who put a superb cross field kick for debutant Bronx Goodwin to leap high and tap the ball straight to Adrian Purtell who dived over. This try coincided with that ‘dingus’ Russell (you can thank the Queanbeyean boys for coming up with that word) being put up on the big screen just so we could all point and laugh at him. However Carney’s missed conversion meant we hadn’t won the game yet, and just like the Raiders love doing they spilt possesion straight from the kick-off to give Souths a final chance to try and level the scores.

Fortunately for us Souths attack that night would struggle to score in a brothel, they dead set had nothing. Even when they made space, they would sabotage themselves by using ball hogging glory hunters like Hegarty.

Full time blew and we all went up as one. Once the Fox Sports editors had enough of our ugly mugs we made our way down to the sideline to congratulate the boys. To their credit they came over to the sideline shook hands and hugged the fans that made the trek. It was only afterwards that I noticed my jersey had some nice mud stains on it from hugging the likes of Withers, Miller, Goodwin and Co’s damp jerseys, maybe I should not wash it and eBay it, after all , how many jerseys out there have genuine Telstra Stadium mud on them?

Anyway enough side tracking, I think it is good for the team to show that much respect to fans, I doubt all the clubs in the NRL go to that much effort, especially after a regular season match. It wasn’t our best win of the season by any means, but the fact we ground it out and defended our line brilliantly left the players really pumped.

Leaving Telstra Stadium was brilliant, all Raiders fans merged together and walked out of the stadium chanting and singing. Sport is an amazing thing as it can unite total randoms in such a way nothing else comes close, in saying that it can also have the opposite effect.

After we got out of the gates we had a brief Seinfeld type moment where we forgot which level our car was parked on, fortunately the crap crowd and lack of cars meant we found it much quicker than expected.

A brief stop at Hungry Jacks for a feed and the bottle-o for beer where I was confirmed by a staff member that CARLTON UNITED BREWERS OWN FOSTERS NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND! (Unfortunately some people still refuse to concede defeat on this). At that same bottle-o we managed to get a free bag of ice, to this day we still don’t know whether it was given to us in pity.

I think it is amazing just how much quicker the trip back down the Hume is after you record a victory, time flew by and we were back in Canberra in no time. To my surprise I ran into some Army regulars on the prowl in Civic just outside Ali Baba, was good to see them as well as the other random people that greeted me which included 1 bloke who decided to kiss me on the cheek in celebration. Still got no idea who it actually was…

To sum it up, Saturday was the perfect hit and run mission, leave Canberra 3:45, get to stadium 7:10, watch Raiders grind out victory, return to God’s country before 2am.

A few other quick notes:

* Again, great to see such an excellent turnout of Raiders fans, kudos to you all.

* Well done to David Milne and Bronx Goodwin, you may have solved our wing problems.

* Nathan Merritt not picked for rep sides because he’s aboriginal? Based on last night it was because he is an overrated dingus (yep I used that word again)

* Big thanks to Shannon Hegarty for butchering a try by being the ball hog he is.

* I woke up this morning with a nice sized bruise on my elbow… Still no idea how I got that.

* South Sydney Fans, it’s not the smartest idea to try to bag out the opposition fans as they leave the stadium after your team just LOST.

Thanks for reading once again… this is Marko, signing out.

South Sydney Away… Love it.

Raiders Army Review: Parramatta Round 4

Thursday, April 12th, 2007

Once again Marko filling in for Ultra.

Those who read my last report, stop reading now if you don’t want to be disappointed - with no Army bus this week, it meant half the fun is lost already. Anyway I hope there is something in here to give you a laugh.

So no Army bus, this week. Just 2 of the Canberra Army contingent made the trek up to Parramatta to see our boys in a match we thought we would dominate. How wrong we could be! There was almost nothing positive to talk about the game, in fact the real action occurred in the stands, but more of that to come.

After a trip that lasted 3.5 hours, we reach Sydney. There had been on and off rain upon reaching Sydney, so we did know exactly what to expect, but when you see it pissing down in Blacktown you knew it would be a wet night.

Arriving at the ground before Flegg we contemplate heading straight in, but a torrential downpour sees us seek cover in the neighbouring Parramatta Leagues club. Being a lad from sheltered Canberra I thought the Tradies club had the biggest pokies room - Parramatta Leagues totally annihilates this. This place is a Pokies lounge that has remote links to rugby League in it. Being a leagues club you would think it would be easy to find a big screen with sport and a table to sit down and have a beer… Wrong. There were a few spare seats in the club, but all were next to pokies. Now I’ve been known to have the occasional flutter on these things, but only at my local or the Tradies, where I am supporting the Community and the Raiders. There was no way I’m supporting a club that pays Brett Finch’s wage.

So after a beer or 2 at mini Vegas, it was off to Parramatta Stadium, which is conveniently a stones throw away from the leagues club. We enter the stadium and meet up with about 3 other raiders supporters that were in the ground. Being quite hungry I head for the food stands. Now we all know stadium food is average at best. Those hot chips I purchased at the Raiders/Knights game tasted like they were left over form the previous match against the Storm and simply microwaved for that “fresh taste”. Having already low expectations I head up and order some hot chips and some “chicken strips“. The chips were actually quiet nice and I was gob smacked when the Chicken strips actually contained and tasted like read chicken!

Premier League is a very dull affair, we don’t have great ball security and in a scrappy affair we lose 24-4. We were able to keep our spirits up by having a bit of fun in the stands playing a harmless little prank though…

Back home in Canberra was a person who wanted some Premier League updates, now there was not much to talk about so we decide to send a simple text saying “Zillman playing fullback in Premier League”. Not even 4 seconds after pressing “send” our shocked recipient rings up, so the phone is passed over to the cool and collected myself who simply tells Zillman is in Jersey #20 in Premier League and that there is a reshuffle in the backline. Our caller is shocked and immediately starts to panic, so after agreeing with him how much of a “bloody outrage!” This all is we let our friend go. We would receive a text message some time later abusing us. Totally expected though. What was even funnier was that our exclusive “scoop” was posted on the Greenhouse forum! Unfortunately we did it too close to the 1 hour deadline of teams being named, so the prank didn’t have it’s maximum effect… I guess for me it’s a case of Schifty by name, Schifty by nature.

The match - what is there to say? We couldn’t catch a cold, we gave away stupid penalties and looked totally lost out there. But the bigger joke was some of the antics by Parramatta stadium. First of all their mascot, an eel, doesn’t even look like an eel, it looks more like an arcade machine. What’s even worse is that it has arms and legs, since when do eels have arms and legs? Next, the subway mascot, loosely reference Lara Bingle,
What the Bloody Hell is that? It is the most rough looking messy mascot ever. Unfortunately it was not witnessed after halftime. Early investigations indicate that Mark Riddell was spotted with a full stomach just before kick off in the second half…

But finally, the most undoubtedly lamest thing was the “Parra, Parra” chants played over the P.A. Now it is one thing to play music and even a beat to pump a crowd, but to play a computerised chant? I guess you need something for the famous Parra fans who are known to boo their side when they’re losing and throw their jerseys on the field. Just on jerseys, how many do Parra want? I don’t think I saw 2 people wearing an identical jersey at Parramatta Leagues.

With a poor turnout in the rain, we didn’t expect to be heard or noticed that much. How wrong we were to be. The Parra game had produced a new Army sensation, a young lady who goes by the nickname “Pickle”. This girl was our voice for 90% of the night, despite being hammered on the field, watching our side play like absolute crap and self destruct, she kept the faith all match and took up the fight to the Parramatta fans despite being heavily outnumbered. She fought on all match and even succeeded in having some fans move away from our area (although the rain may have played a part in this). We may have got smashed on the field, but we lost nothing in the stands that night. I would love to repeat some of the things said but this is a family forum, and although I fully endorse and support everything Pickle said, it is best they are not posted up here.

I obviously left most of the game out of my report but I will mention Michael Weyman steam rolling Luke Burt - it was clearly the play of the night. Big Mick proved you don’t need to be a new age agile quick footed mobile back to make an impact.

We leave Parramatta totally drenched and without the points, stop at Pheasants Nest for some food and hit the long road back to God’s Country. Unfortunately all I remember of the trip back is falling asleep somewhere north of Goulburn and waking up at the airport, I guess that shows what happens when your ipod randomly selects crap you don’t even recognize. Just on music - Shannon’s Noll “Shine” definately the worst song that I could have played upon departure.

So we got smashed, big deal. At least those Sydney media muppets will stop talking us up now pretending to know about our side. We have a young pack, we are full of talent and we will make the 8, mark my words.

We just need to learn to play wet weather footy.

Stay true people, our next match is against the Roosters on Monday night, I hope to see you all there and perhaps at the Tradies post match afterwards to celebrate a big win.

Stay Green people, and remember to Believe.

Marko.

P.S. Marko’s tip of the week - jump on Purtell for first try scorer.

Raiders Army Review: Brookvale Round 1

Friday, March 23rd, 2007

Marko is Filling in for this weeks Away Day Review.

So after a off season which felt like an eternity, the Army finally got together for Round 1 and the trek up the Hume Highway to Brookvale Oval - which I would soon find out is the worst Rugby League ground in Australia.

At 1pm, 10 hombres leave the Hellenic Club in Woden armed with little more then their club colours and 3 cases of beer. 5 Minutes into the trip it is realised that my famous mistake of not bringing a bottle opener for the Sharks trip last year has been repeated. In other words, we are screwed.

Not wanting to lose any time, we decide it’s best we hold off buying one until we reach our rest stop destination in Goulburn. So what to do until then? With 10 very intelligent blokes on the bus we were bound to come with up with a good solution. The steps of the bus? Nah too hard, plus only one person could reach them. Shirt? Well have you ever tried to remove tops off Corona’s and Pure Blondes with your shirt? You’ll get nowhere, plus end up with ripped clothing. Teeth? None of us are that brave. Edge of the roof on the bus? An idea so crazy it might even work… and it did! Ignore the fact that we will be travelling at 100+km/h, holding the bottle out the window and ripping it open off the roof is perfectly safe and VERY effective. What isn’t so effective is Ultra’s bright idea to pour excess beer out the window when someone sitting behind him (me) has his window open. The liquid will simply flow straight back into that unfortunate bloke sitting behind them. Another interesting fact I learnt is that window washers don’t accept beer as payment. Guess you can’t drink on the job though.

So after about an hour of travelling we reach our rest stop at Goulburn, and promptly hit Subway to get some much needed food into us. Kudos to Subway Goulburn, they did a great job feeding us.

Now back to the bottle opener crisis, after a discussion that went nowhere I decide to step up to the plate and see what I can find in this local servo. They had 1 type of bottle opener, a dodgy plastic Raiders one, which played an unrecognisable ‘That’s my Team’ every time you opened a bottle. $12.95 too, more then you’d expect but this device would make our lives a lot easier.

A bit later an event occurred which will probably go down as the funniest in Raiders Army history. Travelling along the Hume we come past a car with a group of girls that some of the Army members knew. An unnamed Army member then came up with the idea of something quite “inappropriate”. The idea itself was funny enough, but to gradually creep the bus up beside them only for them to witness this up against the windscreen at 110km/h sent everyone into stitches, the looks on those girls faces was priceless. So not surprisingly they try to speed clear of that sight. We didn’t let them get away so easily though and it took them 2 or 3 times before they finally managed to speed away from the bus. The Army member who knew them promptly received a phone call from one of the girls where they shared their disgust with him and he ensured her that he had nothing to do with it (NOT!)

So at 5:30 we finally reach our destination, ‘Brookvale Oval’. It is obviously called an oval because the ground doesn’t meet the criteria to be classified as a Stadium, and boy does that show. It is fairly ironic that a team in one of the richest areas of Sydney has such a shite ground.

We enter through the turnstiles, luckily for most the Army we pre-purchased our tickets to avoid missing out on a “sell out” crowd. So of course it was of some surprise to get there and see only family, friends and staff in the ground. Not long after entering an Army member who shall remain unnamed breaks our only bottle opener in half, then half again in an attempt to open his Pure Blonde. The bottle opener had a very short life and the “that’s my team” song would never be heard again, was just a shame it had to go out in such a crap place.

With no Premier League team to cheer on we were forced to keep occupied for a few hours, this time was generally spent catching up with our Sydney mates, chanting “Boring” at the game that was being played, and talking about how Brookvale oval looks like the home ground of a Bosnian Division 4 Soccer club. No joke, I reckon a combined Raiders Army with $1,000 in building supplies could knock up a better joint, in fact, the Raiders should offer to lease ACTEWAGL Park to Manly, it would be an improvement on their ground and boost the local economy.

Once we were bored with those activities, we focused our attention on the poor old Army member who was down on the hill with some good sorts. I’m sure he and those girls he was with would have been very impressed at a group of blokes directing chants like “My Space, My Space” at them. Anyway being a good sport he resisted the urge to beat the tripe out of a few of us which would have been well justified.

So 7:30 finally comes, and there is good support for Canberra. I gotta give credit to all the Raiders fans that turned out, we all knew winning at Brooky was a tough ask, yet you all forked out money to stand in a pathetic excuse for a ground to cheer our young chargers on. Immediately we begin chants taking the mickey out of the Manly ground. “My Garden Shed” is one song those upper class clowns will never forget. Now for those that don’t know the tune, I will share it with you right now.

“My Garden Shed
(Repeat)
Is Better then this
(Repeat)
My Garden Shed is better then this,
It has a door, and a window,
My Garden Shed is better then this”
Sing as many times as you want.

Not long into the match Colin Best marks a superb Raiders debut by spilling a ball on his own after trying to retrieve a kick. A benefit off the doubt decision sees Manly up 4-0. Minutes later Todd Carney grounds the ball in near identical fashion yet it is disallowed? From there things turn bad quickly, and what should have been a 4-4 score line quickly became 14-0 at Halftime.

Quick points after halftime were needed, and they came in the form of Marshall Chalk. Unfortunately straight after that the lights went out. Heres an idea Manly: How about you spend less money on Lyon’s contract and pay your stupid power bills. After 5 minutes of blackout we were away again, sadly our momentum had been clearly killed off by that extended delay. Only a few minutes later the lights went out again, but this time they decided to continue playing. Surely not? That’s right folks, a top flight game of Rugby League was being played with half the lights knocked out. To quote an Army member “I’ve seen better lighting at Monday OzTag at Kambah Oval”. Not much to say about the rest of the game, we fell apart and copped the biggest loss of the weekend. Despite this some moronic Manly fans would feel the need to throw beer cans at us because they couldn’t hack we were still laughing despite being 20 points down. But the less said about that the better…

Full time comes by and we leave that swamp, 2 points would have been nice, but instead we just leave with a random backpack, mistakenly picked up by an (again) unnamed Army member.

We realise we are low on petrol, so pull over at a servo, unfortunately all the petrol money was spent on the 3 beer cases so we each chip in to ensure we could return home.
The trip home really needed some cheering up, that came in the form of seeing Raiders board member Jim Murphy at the traffic lights. So we do the natural thing and cheer him on giving him a clap. His response - to lock his door? Surely he didn’t think we were going to carjack him did he? Anyway further up the road was Local Radio/Canberra Times writer Tim Gavel, he appreciates our attention, but him and the person he is travelling with turn down our offer of Sour Cream and Onion Chips, guess they aren’t fans of that flavour.

The rest of the trip home was a pretty quiet one, most of us were just plain exhausted.
After a long trip back we finally arrive in Canberra at 3am, I get off in Civic and immediately run into some Raiders fans celebrating St Patrick’s Day. They are as disappointed as me and still puzzled to why Zillman was left out.

The Raiders loss had been a real downer. However I must mention the fine 24-hour restaurant we attended at around 1:30am. I’m not sure of the exact location, but it is near Hungry Jacks, and is pretty much the only thing open in the area. At 1:30 am you don’t expect to get the best food, but this place was more than willing to cook up some fresh Chicken Schnitzel Burgers, although if you are buying one of these at 1:30 you don’t exactly want a ready made one.

So at the end of the day:
Bus fee + Beer: $50 a head
E-Ticket to Manly: $27
Food: $30
Returning home to God’s country and not spending a night in that hole of a city otherwise known as Sydney: Priceless

Next game is against the Storm at home, lets hope for a big showing to push the guys home.

Cya there,
Marko.