Getting up at 8:00am is not a good way to start a Sunday, especially when sleep time for the previous night totalled about 3 hours, however there was an RA away trip on so it had to be done.

The faithfuls gathered at Kingston for a 9:00am departure, and in a new RA record, the first bus was on the road 3 minutes early. The other bus had to wait for the Northsiders who were being questioned at the border into the Southside…

Bus 1, the wet bus, was making surprisingly good time, and there was plenty of hearty banter from the front of the bus on the Raiders players and management. Those in the back were trying to pry as much info as we could out of Dugan’s grandma, but she was as tight lipped as Dugan’s defence and didn’t give up anything. KW and I began reminiscing on previous RA adventures, giving the newbies a taste of what can happen when you get on it with the RA!

The compulsory Sutton Forrest Maccas stop allowed the 2nd bus to finally catch up, and after a quick breakfast off the Maccas lunch menu (missed brekky by 5 mins – devo) we were on the road again. We had remembered to put the beers on ice, and keep them on our bus, so all was good. After a bit more debating, which included KW being accosted for not knowing when the next Raiders board meeting was on, the newspaper quizzes came out to play. Being the only one who could read at the back of the bus I was designated quiz master, while the others prepared themselves for questions. Unfortunately for KW, Bindi Irwin was not the answer to any question, and neither was John Newcombe in the Wimbledon trivia. Wayno was dominating everything, with Greg chipping in quietly from the corner every now and then.

Once ‘who wants to be a millionaire’ was over, it was confirmed that beer o’clock had been reached, and the back of the bus duly cracked a few. The 2nd bus, which at this point was travelling closely behind, was not impressed by this fact, as they only had water on board. Needless to say we did our best to show them what they were missing.

Upon arrival at our destination, we parked the buses at the gate, and headed into the worst ground in the league. Seiffert Oval has better seats than disLeichhardt, and that is saying something. Wooden planks greeted those with seating tickets, while those of us with GA at least had some grass for cushioning. The RA congregated on the hill in front of the portable big screen, and cheered on the Toyota Cup boys to a resounding victory over the competition leaders. With first grade kick off fast approaching we realised we had no confetti, enter Jed, the newspaper tearing champion of the RA. He had us 3 bags of confetti in no time, which we spread accordingly over the whole hill as the Raiders ran out. Thanks for stripping, Jed.

No need to go over the game, the Raiders did their best to make us think we were in for a win then hit the showers 5 minutes early. After 75 minutes of silence, Tigpies fans actually started cheering and tried to start up some chant about being a long way back to Canberra. The fact that we wanted to return to civilisation, where the toilets actually flush and dentists exist meant the chant didn’t last too long!

We wandered (crutched) back out to the bus, where KW was given the job of telling the non drinkers they were in the mini van for the way home. None were too disappointed about it, I think it was something to do with the fact that wouldn’t have to stop 15 times for pee breaks on the way.

We boarded the bus, cracked a beer, and went nowhere. Naturally we were sitting ducks for the attentions of passing mouthy, douchebag Tigpies fans with one notable twat unable to do anything other than sing ‘We are the Champions’ at us. The irony here is that this tool was wearing a wallabies jersey and had a haircut from 1993, which looked incredibly shit and we told him so. This jerk probably should have borrowed a hat from the Fat Controller – who was a good sport as he stood there with a ridiculous grin on his face while we proceeded to take the piss out of him and his stupid looking hat. The traffic out of the ground was terrible, but we were parked behind the Raiders bus so managed to give all the boys a cheer as they were walking to it. Massive ups to T Thommo and Monas who stopped and had chat, and also JayCar for giving me his sandwich. The Orr’s and I shared it and man was it a good sandwich – double ham!

After a pee break before we even left the ground, we were off, slowly. We made it about half an hour down the road before another pee stop was ordered. We stopped at a servo in Bankstown that doubled as a kebab store, which did some mean hot chips. As we were about to leave we noticed 2 were missing, only to see Spewing Sam and Slippery running back across the road with some Sunny Vale and Fruity Lexia casks. Trouble was brewing… or spewing…

Attempts were made to get some songs happening, however a mechanical failure with the ipod player meant that there was no backing music, and so every song lasted about 2 lines. The only songs that were finished the entire trip were the Green Machine, Queanbeyan High and Tuggeranong Hawks victory songs. The drinking song also made an appearance, and Spewing Sam, as his new name suggests, was soon decorating the outside of the bus with the Sunny Vale. The RA bus was stopped for its second ever spew stop (the first was on the Dragons away, and that was for Spewing Sam’s brother), and Sam was given a red card for his antics. Liam then decided it was a good time to bring out the Vuvuzela’s and for the rest of the trip the bus sounded like a South African soccer stadium.

Sam assumed the foetal position and passed out, was decorated in Raiders banners, then needed another spew. We stopped at a rest stop with actual toilets which was a nice change compared to the side of the road, next to a sheer rock-face where we has previously stopped. Also handy for someone on crutches, and females in general, as squatting proves difficult….

^Sam - Always spews on the left side of the bus!

We made it to Sutton Forrest Macca’s, where there were no cheeseburger challenges because it is after all, a family restaurant. And also because Marko wasn’t there. Some more chundering and we were ready to go. By this time it was about 9:00pm, there was no booze left and people were turning into major pests (KW). Sleeping was out of the question, as the Vuvuzela’s were out in force, as well as Slippery’s camera which has about a million flashes.

We finally made it back to Canberra about 10:30pm, an hour after the other bus, and everyone headed home with ringing ears and no voice.

Hope to see you all in Bay 72 this coming Monday, when the Raiders take on the Bulldogs at Fortress (?) Bruce.

GO RAIDERS!

Share on Facebook

LOSE Stadium Tour – 2010 Edition, By Wenty Spook

The start of my day was pretty disgusting. On my way to the Railway Station, a fellow passenger was rather hung over and this necessitated an emergency stop so she could have a yack in the bushes outside the swanky new apartments on the Kingston Foreshore. Cop that, yuppies! And so began a day where the theme of spewing would be recurrent. My chucky friend didn’t make it onto the bus.

A full Lyneham High School bus left Kingston at 9:30am ready to head to Wollongong to watch the Dragons take on their bogey team, The Mighty Canberra Raiders. With only four regular Raiders Army members on board it was a fairly tame trip up. Highlights of the journey included watching RA Stalwart, KW’s face darken as he read a piece of fiction, written by Jessica Wrong, that had been published in that morning’s edition of the Canberra Times. I can’t even say that KW had been misquoted, because to be misquoted you actually need to provide a quote or two. The accompanying picture was also rather horrific and probably gave non-Raiders loving readers the impression that Raiders fans are all retarded nuffies.

After a stop at Sutton Forrest Macca’s the first Scrabble match of the season took place and it was Nick (Vandal) versus Marko versus Loz, who vowed to destroy the other two as she was a female and therefore had a much larger vocabulary than both of the lads. The challenge was made in the knowledge that Nick lived in Queanbeyan and probably didn’t know how to spell properly and Marko is from Serbia and only has a basic grasp of the English language. She was wrong. Vandal absolutely spanked the pair of them. We don’t know how he did it, but he kept pulling out with thousand point words such as ‘affy’, ‘gu’ and ‘li’ which were accepted as words by Marko’s (probably Serbian) phone. We know for a fact that Nick is a cheat and that’s why he’s moving to Melbourne.

This was my first ever trip to the ‘Gong and as we rolled into town my first impressions were ‘This is Campbelltown by the sea’. Luckily the closer into town we got, the more things improved. As we pulled up across from the Entertainment Centre we were promptly told that we were not allowed to park our bus in the bus parking area and that the bus had to be moved to the Lighthouse, thus continuing the RA’s strong association with Lighthouses. After bumping into Ness and James, who’d appeared from behind some bushes, we made our way to the Five Islands Brewery where we were met by a sizeable contingent of the Northern RA faithful and Michael. It was still early so Pooley’s most recently digested meal remained safely in his stomach (the accepted alternative location of Pooley’s stomach contents is on Knights fans. See ‘Marc Pooley – More Beer Than Man’), which was fortunate for Kaity as she had already been puked on by another RA member in the previous 12 hours. Suffice to say if she didn’t much like Coldplay before, she definitely wasn’t a fan now. Toby also showed up despite having PMS.

After the downing of several bevvies the RA made their way into LOSE stadium in dribs and drabs. While the setting of the ground is picturesque, it is in need of the upgrade it’s about to get. Hopefully the proprietors update their attitudes too. Apparently if you have GA tickets this obviously means that you are poor and of a lower social standing than those in the stands and therefore cannot be trusted drinking full strength beer. Not only that, Loz was absolutely outraged to discover this was probably the only ground in the NRL that didn’t sell goon, well not to the bogans on the hill anyway.

As the match started it became apparent early on that it was going to be a decent game. Campese has returned to form and Thommo is playing for a contract. The Raiders completed the first half leading 8 – 6. I missed the half time entertainment, but I think it may have been Kristina Keneally. The second half begins and it’s better than the first half with three tries being scored by the Mighty Green in a space of six minutes, pretty much putting the Dragons to the sword – I’ve never understood why the ‘St George’ team would have a Dragon as a mascot, didn’t St George slay the Dragon? Isn’t that like shooting yourself in the foot? – A late consolation try to the Steelers (that’s better!) made the score 22 – 14, but it wasn’t enough to save them and the Mighty Raiders walked away with their 3rd (OMG 3RD!!!) away win for the season and their first free-to-air victory since… I have NFI…

There had been a fair bit of wank in the Sydney media about how the Steelers had a depleted team due to their stars being called away on State of Origin duty. Diddums. Well done to them for ignoring the fact that our boys have been playing with an under-strength team for most of the season due to injuries AND we had our own rep players out for Origin too.

At the end of the match, the Raiders made their way to the hill to thank the fans and then the crowd slowly dispersed at the behest of the LOSE stadium security jerks, but not before we made a Brooke Burrito followed by a round of Stacks-On. We rejoined our bus mates as we waited for the bus and got better acquainted with our fellow travellers while sticking it to as many Steelers fans as we could.

The trip from Wollongong to Sutton Forest was uneventful, apart from marvelling at Vandal’s ability to be able to spot a BWS sign from 5 kms away, but that was all about to change once we hit Maccas. In the past, we always seem make it to Maccas in time to see the Toyota Cup team clean out the restaurant and once were privileged enough to witness Steve Naughton put away 5 cheeseburgers in one sitting (see ‘Run Rabbit, Run Tour – 2009). The following away game saw Marko try to better this by eating SIX cheeseburgers – he succeeded. We didn’t get there in time to see the Toyota Cup boys this time, but word of Marko’s amazing exploits had landed on the ears of the lads in the backseat and one hero decided to give it a crack himself. Our newest friend joined the RA4 armed with six cheeseburgers, and as he fortuitously claimed that he was no stranger to a good vom, everyone gathered around to watch the unfolding spectacle. He got off to a good start by downing the first cheeseburger in a matter of seconds, a second burger joined the first in equally quick succession and just as he takes a bite out of the 3rd burger things went pear shaped. Loz, Marko and Nick were 1/2 of way through (unsuccessfully) finishing a family box when our man turned green and had to make a bee-line for the gents, leaving the remaining burgers fair game to the circling vultures – AKA his mates, who had to be prompted to go and make sure he was OK. And the best part is we’ve got it on video. But I do think if our new anti-hero really wanted to be a serious contender he should have bought seven cheeseburgers… and a bucket…

The remainder of the trip saw Marko, Nick, KW and Loz move to the back of the bus and Pukey McSpew move closer to the door because the windows (when they can be opened) won’t open wide enough to stick your head out for a yack. And for the first time that any of us can recall we had to pull the bus over for a ralph-stop. At least P. McS. managed to set one precedent. Congrats.
So far the LOSE Stadium tour has been the away trip of the 2010 season and I’d like to thank our new friends, Ryan, Sam and Liam for help making the trip more entertaining than we could have ever foreseen and for providing Loz with the goon she missed out on at the stadium. Thanks also goes to Jamie for getting into the singalong and providing some fresh tunes. And last but not least thanks to Jamie’s mum, the Collins 3 and Bernie for being good sports for putting up with our shite singing.

Next up, the boys take on the Titans at Bruce. I’ll see you there! But you won’t see me… SssspPPPppooooOOoooKKkkyyyyy

Share on Facebook

The very last Raiders Army away trip of the year started at the thriving metropolis of Murrumbateman. Kaitlyn did a great job taking the first driving shift and of course got to Sutton Forest Macca’s in time for Breakfast, easy to see she takes after her Mum in the driving stakes.

From here the trip to Ness’ house was pretty uneventful, but noted that the only time we’re quiet is when we’re eating, so we drove along to the many CD’s in the car. Mostly Top 40, techno, rap and R&B. Upon arrival in Western Sydney Ness was ready and eager to hit the road so after a quick change of vehicles and squashing the bags and the banner in the boot, the now massive Army of 3 were on their way. We had a great run on the M7 and before we knew it, we were at the next scheduled pick up point, collecting Paul at the end of the freeway outside Newy.

Not far into this leg of the trip, we became aware that Ness’s car obviously had a duel fuel function, It seemed to be running on Gas at various points. Not quite sure if it was the Gas or just mischievousness, but it was decided we’d have a bit of fun with the RA banner and it graced the “Big Banana” and the “Giant Prawn”.

With a quick change of drivers, Vicky was now at the wheel… we’d already made great time, thanks to Ness’s excellent ability to make up huge amounts of time between speed cameras. It was on this leg of the journey that Kaitlyn declared how the tunnels we were driving through looked like nostrils and questioned why the car then proceeded to dance in time to the music on the way out?? The answer was “Dunno – must have got a bit of boogie in it?” Yes there were several tunnels and the little blue booger Yaris danced into the night.

Windows came down on the way past the Sugar Cane Factory AKA “Cloud Factory” according to Vicky and the overpowering sweet smell of sugar was breathed in.

The last leg of the journey from the Gold Coast to our resting place for 2 nights of Mt Tamborine was hilarious. With Paul now at the wheel the trip up this never ending road going up and up and up the mountain was sung to the tune of “She’ll be coming round the mountain”… getting directions all the way from Vicky’s mate Sue who was describing cars coming in the opposite direction and everyone eagerly awaited the sight of a “Yellow F@*KED if I Know”.

Our accommodation was shared with 8 border collie puppies, they were absolutely gorgeous and everyone quickly had a favourite and we were all ready to bring one home each, well except maybe Paul. For some reason the Pups had taken a liking to his bed and seemed to use it as their toilet.

The next day was spent relaxing in the morning at Surfers, taking in the sights and seeing some ace tail, eating fish and chips and downing a cold beer at the Irish Pub overlooking the beach. The afternoon was a bit of a change of pace when we decided to go to Dreamworld.

It was just one of those days where your face and stomach ache from laughing. The day was finished off beautifully with an excellent feed at the “Titanium Bar” home of the Titans. It was noted that Vicky was proudly wearing a Raiders jacket and managed to get a few smiles and gestures from the locals. Ness enjoyed her “Zillman Sunset” cockatil and bravely cheered for the opposition against the Titans that night. Very cheeky.

Finally Sunday morning came, we said our goodbyes to the puppies and we are on our way to Brisbane. Upon arrival we quickly located our accommodation and wandered off around the streets and enjoyed more beer at a local watering hole.

Before too long it was time to head to the stadium, we made ourselves all green and Kaitlyn and Ness decided they would be the Raiders extra players wearing their footy shorts. But first we stopped off at the local Caxton Hotel for a few more drinks and to meet some more Raiders faithful. The RA Banner was proudly draped out the windows for a few photos.

Upon arrival at Suncorp we settled into our seats in the away fans section and noticed that the area had quite a few seats taken up by Bronco’s supporters. This was soon forgotten by Kaitlyn’s excitement that they sold Red Rooster at the stadium! So after grabbing some food and more beverages, we noticed that we now had started to build up on what ended up an excellent turn out of Raiders supporters at the game.

The whistle for Toyota Cup time on was blown and 3 very vocal females burst into the “My garden shed” chant just for good measure. This little RA was in fine voice the entire night throughout both games and often had the crowd around us in stitches. One Broncos supporter kept telling us to be quiet and complained about our Raiders chants but quickly sat down after being pointed at and copping the “Sit down – shut up” chant and realised that she was in fact sitting in a sea of green, in the Away supporters area. I think this too, may have been the one and only time you will see the Raiders Army dancing – excellent version of the sprinkler much to the joy of other supporters who were clapping and cheering for more.

Sadly we did not end our season with a win in either Toyota Cup or First Grade but our boys went out in style. Hey, at least we scored points and didn’t get flogged 56 to nil. So we held the Banner high and proudly cheered until the end and as the team made its way over to thank us for attending, we all clapped our boys in green. It was at this stage that several groups of people, both supporters and non-supporters, came and congratulated us on our sportsmanship and expressed what a great job the little army did that night. Actually one of these guys proudly said he was from Queanbeyan and we wondered if he was KW’s cousin?? It was rewarding to know that we did good.

And so began the arduous journey of trying to find a cab amongst the bad mouthing Broncos supporters who proceeded to taunt us as we walked along we however followed their taunts with shouts of “56 to nil”…. luckily for Vicky’s whistling ability and the fact that Ness and Kaitlyn were wearing skimpy footy shorts, a cab driver did a U turn ignoring the Bronco hoards to come give us a ride back to the motel, we left the complaining Broncos supporters with the “NaNa Na Na Hey Hey Hey Goodbye” Chant as we drove off..

We arrived back at our Motel and continued to party on into the night with Management having to tell us to tone it down only once…

The trip home began about 10am the next day. Sadly the further south we travelled the colder and wetter it got, but Ness’s little blue booger Yaris was still running on Gas firing from all cylinders and we made excellent time…. There was a sweet smell of Dolce & Gabbana (We wish).

There was a lot of chatting and questioning and healthy discussion on the trip home and through Taree we spotted a sign outside a church saying “The Answer is Jesus” so from then on everything we asked got answered with “JESUS” ie: Who played Hooker yesterday? … JESUS!! That one sign was better then all 10 of the “Making Love, Do it Longer” signs that we saw on the way up.

In closing, the Raiders future is very bright, we have a young side that have gained so much experience this season and next year will be something to look forward to…. We can’t wait. And we can’t wait for the first away trip next year, perhaps it could be for one of the trial games.

As a final note I think as supporters we need to keep faith, even though we may be losing players we highly consider, we still have excellent and special talent at the Raiders in both grades and under Andrew McFadden and Dave Furner who bleed green we can only excel.

So everyone Take care and enjoy the break over the off-season. Stay safe and “BELIEVE”

xoxox

Vicky, Kaitlyn & Ness

Share on Facebook

After a traditional Raiders Army communication break down, we got in touch with “The Ferrari” who informed us he was right around the corner.
So for a record 2nd time in one season, a Raiders Army away trip departed within 10 minutes of it’s scheduled time, this record is not expected to be broken in 2010.

Just as we got out of Lyneham, there were already indications that an unnamed traveller was feeling quite hungry. At this point it became very clear that we would be stopping before the Raiders Army official away trip restaurant at Sutton Forest, this boycott may or may have not done damage to our already fragile relationship with this stakeholder..

An uneventful first hour had passed when we decided to stop over at the only McDonalds in Australia that Todd Carney cannot legally enter. Any hope of a quick lunch were dashed when it became quite clear that half the local population had also decided a Macca’s lunch was an ace idea.

After grabbing a no so quick bite, or in Kaitlyn’s case a McSmorgasbord, we were off. The next few minutes flew by as we listened to Loz lecturing Kaitlyn that if she kept up the Maccas addiction she would have to “wash herself with a rag on a stick”, (we had no idea at the time, but this would become the catch phrase of the night)

The trip needed some music, fortunately I had brought along a C.D which contained musical greats like Rick Astley and Shannon Noll just to name a few. Unfortunately I didn’t seem to format the CD correctly. I think that shows the extent of my I.T skills, I don’t know whether it’s hilarious or a massive concern that I am one of the people that run this website.

After a brief tour of the beautiful Lakemba, we arrive at the Brewery at about 3:30pm to meet the four other Raiders fans who were in agreeance that having some pre match drinks four hours before kick off was a logical idea. Why we left at 12pm for a 7:30pm match I will never know, even the Toyota cup didn’t start until 5:30.

Just after 4pm the drink prices seemed to shift to event day mode. I guess the dogs vs Raiders at the Olympic stadium is something that people circle on their calendars. At 5pm I rush to the ticket office and couldn’t believe my luck when I ended up being the 3rd person in line. No way was I missing out on my ticket to this epic blockbuster. As I farewell some fans through gate B; which has more security than attending fans, I head back to the brewery to see if the Raiders fans count had cracked the double digits yet.

After a couple more XXXX beers at the reasonable price of $5, all 9 of us decide it is time to go into the stadium. Just before we walk into our away fans section we notice that they have a surfboard ride set up. While this was probably more aimed at the kids in the ground, we would eventually end up visiting this attraction later in the night.

After grabbing some Tooheys and some hot chips which tasted like they had been sitting on the counter since Stadium Australia first opened, we headed down to our supporters bay which had a reasonable turn out considering our ladder position. Celebrity Raiders fan and season 2 winner of the biggest loser Sam even joined in to become part of the massive sea of green.

Just before kick off we are greeted with a posse of teenagers who think they are hard core because they are sitting in the away supporters area instead of the other 68,000 empty seats. . Anyway that’s not to worry, if this is how they get their thrills in Western Sydney then who am I to judge.

The whistle for time on is blown and 3 Tackles in an executive decision is made that we should start up the old “My garden shed Chant”. Thankfully the Raiders faithful all decided to get involved which saved me looking like a complete clown for starting a chant that nobody else was involved in.. I think some locals around us were stunned due to the extreme irony of the song.

The RA were in fine voice throughout the first half and at 15-10 we were more than in the match. Another positive sign was that security seemed to have backed down on earlier attempts to get us to sit down due to the complaints from our Bulldogs supporting friends. Although it did seem that the small group was fortunate to be able to move up in one of the 35 empty rows behind us, I guess they secretly loved the Raiders too much to move away from our bay.

Sadly one of our new friends, his night was cut short when he was ejected from the stadium for under age drinking. After giving him a cheerio song it was off to attempt the surfing challenge. I think the operators of the ride could work out that we came from a land locked town by the fact our Canberra contingent couldn’t manage to crack 5 seconds on the board, between us.

The 2nd half was an interesting one, at 21-10 down and Monaghan off the field we knew it was going to be a tough ask. How ever we continued to believe and did out best to try create some atmosphere in that soulless stadium. We weren’t big on numbers, but we had plenty of heart and gave it out all, and to the boys credit they kept fighting and pulled the margin back to 21-16. This only lifted the spirits in bay 104-1 and a try in the corner gave Terry Campese a chance to put us in front, unfortunately the kick waved away and a penalty goal to the dogs on full time sealed our fate.

However we were still very proud of our boys. We have a very young side that is getting valuable first grade experience and gelling as a team. Keep the faith people, we have a very special group of players at our club right now. Dave Furner is also a man that is fully committed to the Raiders, combine these two and I think we have a winning formula.

So we say good our goodbyes and make the trek to the car, some requiring assistance. At this point of time we just want to get out of there but unfortunately we are stuck in grid lock with some Fat Pizza rejected cast members right behind us constantly blasting their horn and yelling abuse. Thankfully we were eventually on the highway and they were off to look cool in the car park of a local McDonalds.

Going out of Sydney we noticed a few fire trucks that were in a hurry to get to a massive factory fire in the distance. It did cross our minds that the same fine citizens we encountered only minutes earlier were possibly involved in this. The 10pm bulletins confirmed our suspicions when it was revealed that the factory was in fact a car yard, no wonder they were in a hurry, they had a massive insurance job to pull off. With with the tunes from Triple M now blazing we were approaching Sutton forest in good time..

Just after an emergency rest stop, we faced an ethical dilemma of whether or not to pick up a hitch hiker. Much to Kaitlyn’s disappointment we drove past him. I’m sure it would have been fine though, after all there is nothing suspicious about a bloke hitch hiking about 20 minutes outside Sutton forest at 1145pm on a Saturday night, it is possible that our hitch hiker could have been the Raiders Army‘s version of Russel Coigt KW looking for a ride back to Q-Town. (btw KW’s All Aussie Adventures will be available on DVD for $24.95 just before Christmas)

We arrived at Macca’s to find the freakish tradition of arriving just after the Toyota cup team had continued. I really don’t know how we end up running into them at every away trip. Maybe they sit in the car park and wait until we arrive just to take the piss. After the entire squad is fed, we eventually make it to the counter and put our orders in. Kaitlyn decided to take Loz’s earlier advice on the Macca’s and only order 20 nuggets and 2 cheeseburgers.

While waiting for our food a random Raiders fan decided it was a good idea to attempt to play some music using buttons of the eftpos system, you really do see a lot of strange things when out in the middle of nowhere..

Once we were on the road again it was somehow decided it was good idea to phone up random people just to say a certain Simpson’s quote, again we apologise if anyone received random voicemails at approximately 1230am. After a short debate about whether a tree is a vegetable and whether or not it looks like Broccoli we were past Goulburn.

We decided against stopping off for some $2 horse manure and arrived back in Canberra just after 1am, it had been quite a long day and I think everyone was glad to be back home.

Sadly this it is for our Sydney trips this season, there will be a great turn out of Raiders fans in Brisbane but I can’t see many making the trek to New Zealand.
I have heard rumours that Kaitlyn and Loz are attempting to paddle there using only a raft and a rag on a stick, if that eventuates a very interesting review will be sure to come up .

On Saturday night we take on the Dragons at home base, I encourage all fans to get out there and support our boys against the current competition favourites. There will be a big turnout of the (un)faithful Dragons Army so it is important we also turn out in numbers.

Take care and enjoy the rest of the season.

Believe

-Marko.

Share on Facebook

OK, I’m not going to bore you with stories about the atmosphere on the hill, the fact the Raiders wasted more opportunities than Greg Norman, or my sneaking suspicions that Newcastle fans are all related to each other and have two heads. You’re here to read about Marc Pooley, a man who went from being ‘that balding bloke who went bananas at the Souths game’ to a legend in the space of three hours and 37 standard drinks.
Pooley started drinking early, and was already well on the road to being smashed when he jumped on the train to Wyong at around four o’clock. As soon as we pulled out of the station he pulled out a tub of vodka jelly – which was more vodka than jelly, I can tell you – and started downing it. By the time we hit Broadmeadow he was stumbling all over the place like Michael J. Fox, but he was just getting started.
We made it to Wests Leagues and Pooley tucked into a couple beers. Wait, scratch that, he didn’t tuck in as much as he poured them down his throat as if his stomach was on fire. Deadset, he’d polished off two schooners before I’d made it a third of the way through my first and he wasted no time heading back to the bar for more. It was then that we sensed something very, very special was going on. Not even the fact that Mohawk was Mohawk-less could take away from the magic.
We made it to the ground with about 20 seconds to spare, and Pooley disappeared to the bar. He staggered back to the hill where Sik Nik (it probably wasn’t him, but let’s say it was) started begging him to skoll three beers. He did it, then headed back to the bar for more. The bar staff already knew him by name and the game had only just kicked off!
After that the jelly made another appearance, and it was around this time that Quentin (Kenihan, not Pongia) turned up to watch the game. You’ll remember him as the wheelchair-bound larrikin who stole our hearts because he’s a midget in a wheelchair.
Anyway, trust Pooley to accidentally spill a beer all over Quentin, forcing the poor bastard to scoot off into the distance.

Perhaps overcome with disappointment after his idol deserted him – or due to the fact he’d been stealing wine off every girl in the vicinity – Pooley then fell down the hill, gathering momentum like a snowball and sending friends and foes alike scuttling out of his way. Think of that scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark with the boulder, but replace the rock with Pooley and Indy with a toddler in a Knights jersey, and you’ve got some idea of how terrifyingly hilarious the whole thing was.
But nothing – and I mean nothing – can prepare you for what happened next. As far as we were concerned, Pooley just vanished into thin air after that. We called his phone, but he didn’t answer. We started chanting his name, but he didn’t come back. The second half started and the Raiders were still losing, and the place was dry and barren without our lantern of hope. The game finished and we walked out with our heads hung low and no Pooley.
It wasn’t until days later that we learnt the full, horrific tale, and it was so batshit insane that a donkey with a fish taped to its head would look normal in comparison.
During the half-time break Pooley – who by this point was more beer than man – vomited on an opposition fan. Let me say that again: MARC POOLEY PARKED A TIGER ON A NEWCASTLE SUPPORTER.
Tragically I don’t have a photo of Marc chundering, so you’ll have to make do with this picture I found after a brief Google search. Please note that it looks almost exactly like Pooley.
Anyway, the fans reportedly sprinted away to clean the chunks of carrot and globules of jelly off themselves, only to be replaced by a gang of rent-a-cops intent on turfing our hero out of the ground. But he didn’t go quietly, managing to escape the baton-carrying boofheads for nearly half an hour before being dragged out and threatened with a lifetime ban. From Newcastle. Which is like being banned from having a broken bottle shoved up your blurter.
As the rest of the Army (there was a good turnout… did I mention we were at a football game?) filed out of the ground after the final whistle, Pooley was being dragged into his friends’ car, but he hadn’t put on enough of a performance yet. He kept on puking everywhere like that chick out of The Exorcist, so they dumped him at the nearest train station and wished him luck in not being killed on the way home. Thankfully, he made it home in one piece, which means he’ll be able to disgrace himself at plenty more games to come.
All in all, I haven’t had a night that memorable since Chad from Playing it Straight cracked onto me, and I can’t see how anyone will be able to top ‘King’ Marc Pooley’s inspirational performance. Not even if Butters chows down on another tub of butter.

Share on Facebook

Well, it has been a number of years, but the most infamous RA reviewer of them all has returned. I have been on a sabbatical for the past few years, but have been tempted out of retirement by KW.

The day started as most RA trips do, standing around the frozen tundra (Kingston Railway Station) at 8am, trying your best to avoid the inevitable quota of pest and menace opposition supporters that grace us. In this case, there was one particular individual who fit this category. RAGE (Raiders Army Gold Elite) quickly branded him Wonky Eye Watmough. Luckily for us, WEW was having a hard time figuring out the mechanics of the sweet machine inside the station. This incidentally had striking similarities to Homer getting his hand stuck in the vending machine. Luckily for him, he realised if you let go of the can, your hand is released WEW boarded the bus shortly after.

And we were away! You could smell the optimism that was permeating throughout the bus! That was until some cheeky little struggle and grunt that it would be nice to delivered a machine gun fart buffet (this is defined as a rapid succession of ballistic farts that hang around for an extended period, and may be revisited for another helping due to the ongoing stench).

I think this may have starved oxygen to the brain of the driver, who I think was wearing a t-shirt with the saying I am the Stig on it (that old chestnut), in addition to a cap with Captain emblazoned on it. He was only missing a bbq apron with Worlds best Dad on it. While it was good to say the driver had a high opinion of himself, and thought he may be able to smoke it through hammerhead and gambon at 100mph (see Top Gear if unsure what these terms mean), his driving was akin to the flying skills of an Garuda pilot. I counted at least three occasions where Captain Stig tried to crush cars in adjacent lanes. There was also the bizarre incident where he stopped behind a ute on the hard shoulder of the M5. Ute bloke then picked up a dead pigeon from the back of his ute, throwing it into the middle of the M5. El Capitano de Stig then pulled onto the M5 again, and we were off. This was one of the stranger incidents Ive seen on a RA bus. The only explanation I can think of is that WEW and Marko thought they could smell a smorgasboard, and asked the Stigalicious to pull over.

After taking the Clark Griswald scenic route, we arrived at Brookie at about midday. I know a lot has been said about this hovel in past reviews, but it must be said again. In my view, you can define a true shithole in two ways.

1. By the people who reside/inhabit the area.
2. By the physical characteristics of the area.

This shitpot fails on both counts. I was disappointed to see the locals of the Insular Peninsula hadn’t taken on board my description of them last time (something similar to fat, inbred, swamp donkeys). Whilst the incest and swamp donkey bit may be hard to shake, the protruding sack of fat which extends from the lower abdomen to the upper genital area of many Manly fans surely isnt.

The physical characteristics of the ground also continue to amuse. I still find it amusing for a so-called professional sport, people have to stand on a mud slope to view it. The gradient on the rear of the slope made the trek to the toilet more dangerous than negotiating the Khyber Pass. One of the victims of the Pass was a little lad, who cut himself in the process. The lad sprinted off when one RA member said Come here little boy, I want to help you. Garry Glitter has since been deported from Australia.

Anyway, everyone knows what happened in the game. The Raiders played a good five minutes, and Des Haslers side got away with the two points. Everyone trudged back to the bus, and we were on our way home.

This was an interesting bus trip home. While the bus did have a plastic throne at the rear, it was obviously not ready for the onslaught of gypsy kisses that RA members were going to inflict on it. Within an hour, it was filled to the brim, until WEW realised there was a flush peddle on the side of it (he was still trying to figure out how a lolly machine works). However, this was only a temporary reprieve. An unfortunately placed crack on the side of the throne began to leak, and soon there was a raging torrent of excreta coursing down the middle of the bus. This stopped anyone from using the toilet to syphon the python or pinch a loaf. Any attempts to flush the toilet were now stymied, as the toilet emitted a mist of piss and stench whenever it was flushed. Luckily Brave Stig pulled over, and emptied the chemical toilet into Sydneys water catchment area.

After this was done, the party was on again. WEW and his mate (a lardy version of David Howell), came down the back and joined the party. The songs were being belted out, and everyone was having a great time, except Marko. As usual, Marko had a number of ditties dedicated to him, including Nothing sweet about Marko, Markos got a chub and Thats what you get for waking up in Marko. Unfortunately the RA cocktail (piss, blood, beer) was now covering most of the floor of the bus. This didn’t concern some, and the songs continued to come.

The now shitpot on wheels finally arrived back at Kingston at 10pm. Another funny, but ultimately worthless expedition to see the Raiders have their pants pulled down, and someone do the nasty to them.

Anyway, next week the Raiders take on the Storm in Canberra. Lets hope the Raiders win, inshallah, we need it.

Share on Facebook

It was a great performance by the mighty green last night, and one that we have now come to expect when they face the Rabbitohs. That’s three straight away wins against the bunnies, no mean feat for a side renowned for travelling poorly. Our day kicked off at 1pm when I collected Loz, Marko and the Tarago (that’s right people, a meagre 8 die-hards made the trip north, another very disappointing turn out). A couple of quick stops later and we were on our way North (only 7 minutes after the scheduled departure time, a new RA record). In a not to be repeated mistake, I had earlier allocated the task of filling the esky to our token eastern European member Melancholy. When we reached Lake George and decided to crack the first brew, it was noted that Marko had actually put the ice in first, the beer on top of the ice and the rum cans on top of the beer. A new low for the 2008 RA member of the year. Making her RA debut was Robynne Earl, mother of former regular Tom (aka Ultra) who has moved to the top end and formed our newest chapter; RANT (RA Northern Territory). Membership of RANT doubled recently when his girlfriend joined up. Exciting times up north.

I decided to drive to the Nest to give Shaw-man a well needed rest as he would be navigating the return leg. First beers were cracked at 3pm, with everyone weary of not hitting the bottle too hard with work commitments the next day. Playing scrabble on the mobile phone has become a popular way to kill time on the drive north, and Loz, Shaw-man, Nick and Marko engaged in an epic 4 way battle. We were all a little concerned how Marko would go considering his lack of English (he was even given a 12.5 point start), but it turns out he goes alright.

It decided to rain when we made our only stop on the venture north at Pheasants Nest. A quick steak and cheese pie later and we were on our way again. Shaw-man took over the drivers seat and preceded to cut off a Toyota Starlet, the driver of which decided to display his disapproval of the maneuver with a one-fingered salute as he overtook us (it must be noted that Shaw-man did an admirable job from here on in trying circumstances). A discussion erupted regarding the Army’s patented “Believe” slogan, with Frank suggesting it be changed to “squiggly smooch”. This is why we encourage you to keep your thoughts to yourself mate. Another classic Frank moment came when we were discussing the Matt Johns affair. Frank brought a cease to the ongoing discussion by announcing in a rather soothing priest like manner “we can argue about it all night but what’s done is done”. Indeed Tank, indeed.

At the Brewery, popular RA identity Rupi produced a wad of free tickets, which were snapped up by the green faithful. Once inside the ground, the small but very vocal crew found their voice, and basically owned the cavernous stadium. It was a special night, with the cameras paying us plenty of attention. They seemed to be singling out Central Coast based regular Marc “beetelejuice” Pooley, as well as another regular in Nick “69” Townsend, who was deliberately holding his scarf upside down for some unknown reason. The banner got plenty of air play and is proving to be a great investment. Even Sean “the” Ferrari joined us for the second half, a rare treat as he normally likes to sit with the white collars on half way. In another RA first, Marko was a tad confused at the ANZ Stadium signage and somehow ended up utilising the ladies toilets instead of the blokes. His sidekick Townsend also fell for the same trap, but realised the error of his ways much earlier in the piece than our lovable Serbian.

As is now customary, the players thanked the fans by embracing them after the game. This is always a great moment and the fans were loving it. We have had some great times at ANZ Stadium and it really is starting to feel like a home away from home.

I must make mention of the efforts of two former RA Heavyweights who have now consigned themselves to the RA Reserves alongside Leethal Leeroy Clayton. Former front liner Boing shunned the pre-game drinks and preceded to view the match from the comfort of a corporate box, only showing his face at the end of the game when the players embraced the Army. Similar to Boing’s disappointing effort, Sydney based veteran Craig ‘Sully” Jensen continued his jekyll & hyde approach to supporting the Raiders in 2009, making only a token appearance at the pre-game before heading to his own corporate box and never to be seen again. A far cry from his normal position, front and centre and leading the Sydney boys into battle. No doubt both gentlemen regret missing out on the scenes of jubilation and frivolity that took place in Aisles 101-103.

Upon exiting the ground and engaging in some friendly banter with sullen faced bunnies’ fans, one particularly unenlightened individual attempted to prove to us that John Sutton deserved to be named man of the match. He was laughed at vigorously. The trip home was a little more relaxed than the usual, Marko decided to kill the atmosphere in the back row by playing trivial pursuit on his mobile for 2 hours (whether or not he actually got a single answer correct remains to be seen). At some stage someone removed basically all of the head rests from their slots and put them in the boot. Not sure why. We stopped off at a servo on King Georges road (again, not sure why) where we bumped into Canberra based journos Tim Gavel and David Packwood. As per every away trip, the under 20s side were at Sutton Forest McDonalds when we arrived there. Marko and I have a new favourite Toyota Cup player, Steve “5 cheeseburgers” Naughton, whose new nickname is pretty self explanatory. Somewhere around the Bungendore turn off we pulled into what we thought was a rest stop, but turned out to be the entrance to a farm who luckily enough were selling Horse Poo for the bargain basement price of $2 a kilo. We couldn’t believe our luck. A short time later we were saying our good byes and thinking ahead to the Sharks home game in two weeks time, and more importantly, our trip to “Fortress Brookvale” on June 21st.

As per usual, there was some lost property reported. Aimee has lost her mobile, anyone with any info should send me an email. (kw@raidersarmy.com)

Until next time, BELIEVE

KW

Share on Facebook

My day began roughly about 11am when I landed in Mexico(Melbourne) after a nice beverage or two I was feeling pretty good. After arriving at my hotel I gave two of the army’s best a call (Nick & Katie) who were in Melbourne at the time.
I met them a pub called “Young & Jackson” if I had known the prices of the drinks down there I would of taken out a loan. The average price for a pint was $9 so going shout for shout was getting expensive but I didn’t care at the time, I was just happy I was on the ground.(I’m not a big fan of flying)

A short time later young Rick James came from work to join us, all four of us were discussing many things from the raiders chances of winning to how Nick is more of a girl cause he did more clothes shopping then Katie. Eventually Nick and Kate had to leave to catch there flight back to their homes in Sydney and young Rick James had to go back to work, as for me I just went around the town sightseeing and bar hoping. Many people were looking at me weird as if they were looking like they have never seen a green jersey in their life. One random local even stopped me in the street to ask me what team it was. [Great to see Rugby League making great inroads down there, it's only been 11 year] After a few hours and a $9 pint or two it was time to rendezvous with Rick James. At about 6:15pm we caught the tram down to the game, it was an interesting moment to say the least when we saw a Richmond fan celebrating when his attempt to throw a water bottle into a bin from a distance missed by only 2 metres, I think that showed just how deeply entrenched the AFL culture is down here..

We arrived there just in time to see the Raiders along with that club s**t Brett Finch run over the athletics track and on to the ground. . As for the stadium it self it looks like a glorified version of Shark Park, it was at this moment I wished KW and the QBN crew were here as this joint had a resemblance to a 1968 version of Seiffert Oval. The match was underway as the ball was taken just inside the 4 metre in goal area. For the first 10 minutes we looked good the when big red scored in the corner there was just me and Rick James cheering and believing that this might be our night, could we finally snap this 13 game losing streak??. But unfortunately that was the last of our celebrations for the night as not long after Billy Slater scored off a Cameron Smith kick and then when big Lima ran straight through the middle of our defence we knew it was going to be a tough night. Half time came about and we weren’t out of the game, but really had to score first if we were any hope of beating these purple wearing News Limited Storm, the fact we were also up against a vocal home crowd would only make our task harder. The second half came along and me and Rick James were still staying through and believing that the Raiders can come back. But when Slater scored his second try of a Alan Tongue grubber deep down we knew it was over. However we refused to give up hope. The Storm then went on a scoring spree and being only two people wearing green in a sea of purple we were starting to cop a bit of stick. To the storm supporters credit most of them were really nice and friendly to us, one of the storm fans shouted out to Hinchcliffe “hey Hinchcliffe you’re playing for a real team now!” even I found the funny side of it.

Full time finally came and me and Rick James made our way to the trams. After getting on I was reminded of how sardines must feel. I finally got off near the pub the Young & Jackson and stopped in for a disappointing pint then made my way back to the hotel for the night.

I hope you enjoyed this read and it was what you expecting to read just remember everyone to still believe and don’t give up hope.

Our next home match is on this Sunday against the Warriors, I encourage everyone who can get to the ground to make the effort and support the boys. Remember people form is temporary and one win can be the trigger that starts something special, you only need to look back at 2008 to see evidence of this.

Cheers,

Frank the Tank

Share on Facebook

A special thanks to Ben Ross, who this week stepped up and the now (almost) weekly review. 

After two successive victories , the mighty Canberra Raiders travelled to the Gold Coast in round 6 to take on the Gold Coast Titans at Skilled Park. As an avid Raiders supporter , I took it upon myself to travel up to see the Raiders do battle with the competition leaders. This would be my first time traveling to Q.L.D. , and the longest distance traveled to a Raiders game , surpassing the 2008 effort to Melbourne.

So I was on the 1:10 Virgin airlines flight on the Friday afternoon bound for Coolongatta airport. It was at this that I felt immensely proud to be a Raiders supporter. Every weekend , we as the R.A passionately let it be known that we are mental and mad, and this was never more true. This was no train travel , car ride or a bus trip. This was an interstate flight traveling thousands of metres above sea level to watch the Canberra Raiders play for 80 mins. Thats how I was looking at it.

About an hour or so had passed and I had arrived at Coolongatta airport at 2:10. Having only flown once before , I was suffering severely from the turbulence. However , I was in Titan territory , pumped for kickoff and eager to get to the ground. I jumped on a bus taking in the area , heading for the hotel in Burleigh Heads.

After checking into the hotel , I got ready for the game and made my way for the bus stop opposite that would take me to Robina , i.e Skilled Park. It was here that I came in contact with the local people for the first time. It was only about 3:30pm but that must not be too early for some to get on the drink up there. This man at the bus stop was lying face down on the pavement with an empty bottle of Jim Beam in his hand. This I thought was not what I had traveled for but it sure was interesting to say the least. Luckily the bus came on time and I left the poor bastard there.

The bus however was naturally full of Titans fans and when I say full , I mean packed. Picture that with me standing up the front of the bus dressed in my Raiders Army tee and Raiders gear. I was public enemy no. 1 right now. If I was to take a positive out of it , which I did , it was that it wasn’t going to be hard to find the ground as I’d just follow these blue and yellow fickle folk. Arriving at Skilled Park was filled with much relief though as I spotted a few Raiders fans walking in.

With a ticket for the away supporters bay , I headed for the gates of section 14. There was a good group of Raiders fans waiting to get in when I got there. A Kiwi family dressed in green clothing from head to toe . Great to see , although I thought I was bad with my green jeans. I was thinking of asking them if they would like a photo taken considering there enthusiasm , but after looking at the father , I thought that may be a bad idea.

I did , however , strike up a conversation with a guy in front of me. I started it off with ‘Supporting the Raiders tonight?’ He said he was as he mentioned that he was Stuart Flanagan’s cousin. I didn’t know whether to believe this random or not. He did go onto say that he had just spoken to David Furner and was not happy at being told that Flanagan had been dropped.

A few minutes later , bags were checked , tickets were scanned and I was inside the ground. After not eating anything since breakfast , I set sail for the bar. I would say the food is on par with the Sydney Football Stadiums variety. Chicken strips , Pies and Sausage rolls. With the food I needed an alcoholic beverage , and not being a spirits drinker I checked out the beer prices. It was then much to my astonishment , that I was left with a Hahn premium light for $6 (not a fan of XXXX). I thought $6 for a light beer was a bit steep considering they had already charged me $29 to get into the joint. I reluctantly accepted the $6 beer price and headed inside.

The customer service lady greeted me with an interesting look once she saw that I was from the Raiders Army. I was a one man army , not like I could cause much trouble. Many more Raiders fans were gathering which was good to see. Regulars to Sydney and Canberra fixtures , Paul ‘Newy_raider’ , raiderette_ness’ ‘Philgrahamgirl’ turned up. It was good seeing a few regular faces.

The U/20’s had kicked off and the stadium was certainly ‘like a library’. All you could hear was the ball being kicked and peoples phones going off. A tight first half , Gold Coast’s young side spilling the ball a number of times just before the line. Halftime came , 4-0 to the Titans. At halftime , I threw my set seat out the window , not literally , but I moved , eager to get closer to the field. As we all know the second half ended in a score line of 40-10. I was hoping it wasn’t going to resemble the first grade match. One thing is for sure is that we all knew by then that Travis Waddell was playing in first grade , much to the delight of just about everyone (except of course Stuart Flanagan’s brother) .

It was 30 minutes till kick off , newy_raider and myself moved up higher in the stands to get a better view and to spread out a bit. The Gold Coast officials certainly put on a show in regards to the match day entertainment . With a competition to win a Jet Star flight to a Titans away game on offer (much like the local liquor ad) , and also $500 to win if you won a race inside a blow up ball.

After all that madness too place , kick-off was upon us and out came the Raiders. I threw up the 4 papers of confetti while others waved there flags. Section 14 was sprinkled with Raiders ready to voice there support. That other side , the Titans were out and and supported loudly by many. Some good defence from the men green in the opening minutes set up an encouraging first half half. A raiders try to new kid on the block Jarrod Croker in the opening 3 minutes sent all of us into hysterics. It was what we had been hoping for , and was a great way to start off the first set.

Canberra continued there tight defence , hanging on at stages and having luck at times when the Titans spilled the ball. 6-4 to the Raiders at the break and all of us felt pretty satisfied with how things had gone. A few more tries would obviously had been nice , but to be 6-4 up in an away match against the second placed side was a very good effort. The Raiders were would be running towards us in the second half so we could give them all the support they needed. The first 20 minutes was much the same as the first. Tight defence , a few mistakes . The Titans however , were the first to score in this half with a controversial try to former Raider William Zillman. It went up to the man upstairs , but to the disappointment of many it was awarded and Scott Prince converted.

We were all desperate for the Raiders to hit back with a try and with about 15 minutes to go they did. From a bit of creativeness and intuition , it came from Adrian Purtell in the corner. Up in the stands , we went off with a feeling that we would be heading back home with a sweet victory. Campo missed the conversion so it was 10-10 with about 10 minutes to go. We were all on the edge of our seats hoping for someone to break the line , a chip over the top. Personally I thought a field goal wouldn’t be enough to win. Campo had an attempt and it was a swing and a miss from . The thought of extra time came to mind. However , with two minutes to go Matt Rogers darted past a few defenders and that was game set and match.

It was a feeling of ‘damnit’ once the siren sounded but then I thought it was better than what I expected. To travel that distance and get a competitive match like that is not too bad at all. They tried hard , put in and thats all you can ask for.
So it was off back to the hotel , copping some smart **** comments from a few Titans fans as I made my way to the bus. Not knowing the area all that well I ended up getting off too early and had to walk another 10 minutes to the hotel. With the alarm set for 7am for a 10am flight , it was time to turn in for the evening.

The day after the match and I made my way to the airport for the flight back home. A young Raiders fan was in the same line to get his flight ticket. I mentioned the loss to him but I think I scared him unintentionally. I also spotted a Bulldogs fan and told him to be ready for Sunday. I thought I had seen the last Titans fan the evening before but there was one at the airport with his flag ready to fly home as well.

About to board my flight , I noticed the Referee’s leaving also on there cheap Jet Star flight. I didn’t say anything to them , could have , but wanted to get home safely without causing a ruckus. On the plane and satisfied with the trip up , a win would of been the icing on the cake , a great B’day present. In the end , I satisfied with the competitive match and if the Raiders keep up that sort of play they will cause trouble for many sides.

Share on Facebook

I make my return to the writer’s seat this week for the review, hope you all enjoy it!

  Away wins haven’t come as often as we would have liked over the past few years, but this one was definitely one that will never be forgotten.

The day started with the crew all meeting up with what has (unfortunately) become a regular departure point in QBN McDonalds.. A couple of us grabbed a quick feed and then congregated in the car park to wait for our chariot to arrive.

After expecting the Old Lyneham High bus to rock up, the regular RA members were given a nice surprise when we were informed that not only was our mini bus NOT the LHS one, but it was a model that was built post 1971.
At 12:45, 15 minutes letter then the scheduled leave time (which is actually a very good effort for an RA trip). I had burned one of my Ipod play lists to CD but this was nullified when we notice the bus didn’t have a CD player.. Unfortunately some of us would later forget this minor detail..

After some of the girls reluctantly squashed into the back seats we were off.. Since we were in for a long trip, we decided it was best to lay off the beers for a while- or until we at least crossed the NSW border… It was a shame Henson couldn’t make the trip as we had stocked up well on his favourite Carlton Fusion Beers. We also had a couple pure blondes, some ‘leg opener’ for Loz as well as some **vomits** woodstock bourbon.

As we hit the highway discussion about a wide range of topics were brought out. Although I think myself and much of the bus were a tad surprised when 3 un named RA members (2 from QBN) claimed they would change their lifestyle choice for a night if it meant the Raiders winning a premiership.. I know it has been a while since our last win, but I can only imagine what these boys would be willing to do if they were sharks fans.. By this time we had decided NOT to stop at Collector for a warm beer. We did however remind people that the Pumpkin Festival is on May 5-7 and that seats on the RA bus to the event are strictly limited.

The subject of fantasy teams then came up, AFL, NRL and EPL. The award for signing of the century has to go to one of the Q-Town locals who managed to Sign Bolton’s Gary Cahill instead of his Australian and Everton Midfielder Brother in Tim, some brilliant management there.
To make the trip go faster, me and Vandal competed in a game of Scrabble on Shawsy’s mobile. After shooting out to a big lead, I was pipped at the finish thanks to words like “Plew” which were scored on triple word score. WTF is a plew [even Microsoft word is underlining this in red], I was even more dumbfounded when scrabble rejected my word in “Domoose’ which would have won me the game. By now we had successfully managed to waste a good 90 minutes. A quick pit stop at pheasants nest and we were on our way.

After our brief stop me and Nick entered round 2 of scrabble (which has become popular game on away trips). This time however Shawsy and Aimee had a little wager on the outcome. Aimee (bravely) backed me to win by 1-12. Shawsy on the other hand went the opposite and had the Dutchman at 1-12. The game again was a see sawing contest, in the end my opponent piggy backed of my word PLOW to take out victory- by what appeared to be 12 points. Unfortunately though I had 1 letter remaining which resulted in a 1 point penalty and the Vandal 1-12 option which was paying $3.90 was mad null and void.

We ended up a bit lost when trying to find Toyota Stadium, The detour saw us pass ANSTA (Australian Nuclear Science and Technology. Organisation- or Office as one person suggested). This was the point where we decided it was best to ask for directions as myself and a few other people were getting flashbacks of the Knights trip in 08 where we ended up at a Soil Farm.

All these unexpected delays meant some bladders became very unstable and an emergency pit stop had to be made at a random service station. Unfortunately this service station only had 1 toilet facility and the line ended up going 9 deep, which ensured that the pit stop was anything but a quick one. In fact I’m guessing some people could have walked to the ground by the time we all boarded the bus before taking a scenic route to Toyota Stadium, you know you have gone too far when you almost end up driving into the golden sand of Cronulla Beach. It was also very interesting to notice how many people in the area have Southern Cross tattoos.. I guess this isn’t really a surprise though.

Eventually we made it to the Sharks Leagues club, but the unexpected delay meant there was only time for a few drinks out of plastic schooners before it was time to head down to Toyota “Stadium”.

For those who have read past reviews, you probably be more than aware of our thoughts of Toyota “stadium”. For the purpose of keeping the review, I will simply describe the ground as Seiffert Oval with a paint job. Although saying that is actually a bit disrespectful to Seiffert as they don’t actually try pass off their oval as a “Stadium”.

After greeting all the Sydney folk, I only had time to share 1 champagne- (yes Champagne) with Nick before the match was about to get underway.

As we all know these reviews are not about the match, all I will say is that Away wins are great no matter how they come. The Sharks are a tough side to beat at home, and the boys all dug in. The scenes when Terry Campese ran away 75 metres for the match sealer were something special. All the Raiders fan went up as one, we’ve had a tough time on the road lately and the feeling of knowing you are taking the points at an away match is a great one.. The Raiders Army was in fine voice all match and old favourites like “My Garden Shed” was belted out many times with both Raiders fans and and even some locals seeing the funny side to it. There were plenty of other chants on the night including the famous “Stand Up If You’ve won the League” and the younger sharks supporters seem to clean up all our confetti, I guess they don’t see too much of that on Family (radiation) hill.

The scenes after full time were really a special and unique one. As has become tradition, the players came to the sideline to thank the fans. However there was more to come, to the credit of the match day officials, they decided to let all the fans onto the playing surface, this allowed us to individually thank some players and then start up a “CAMPO” chant for our local hero. However it was decided that a chant was not enough, so a group of fans lifted up Campo and lifted him onto our shoulders. I think Campo was a bit shocked to be shown this sort of love by the fans, I guess opposition fans may have seen this as a bit over the top, if Campo plays like that I would gladly help lift him up every week.

I would give out my 3-2-1’s for the match, but I think there were too many people out there that deserved points. Campo’s on field performance was amazing though, so I guess he gets the 3 for the player of the year

Walking out of the ground after an away win is always good fun, it is amazing how many Cronulla fans will try yell something at you despite the fact their side has just been beaten.. The usual “Go Back to Canberra” was thrown out.. We were definitely glad to be heading back to the Nation’s capital.. Some other fans decided to comment on how far away Canberra is, while Canberra is a fair distance away it was nowhere near as long as Cronulla’s premiership drought.

While waiting for the others to return a few of us decided to use the facilities at the Servo, again there was only 1 in place which meant another line. To kill some time I helped some of the girls choose a C.D to play for our trip home, in the end we bypassed Connie Francis and went with some Megamix album at the very reasonable price of $30. It was only upon returning to the bus that he remembered that our vehicle did not have a C.D player on board, clearly there is no shortage of smarts in the Raiders Army… But who needed a CD player when we had Shawze and Loz singing that Stan Bush Classic – ‘You’ve got the touch’!

After about 10 minutes on the road we decided to stop at a local shop to pick up some beverages. For reasons only know to himself, RA’s resident Irons fan decided it was a good idea to climb onto a random roof of some building. After managing to get down safely, the big lad decided to sprint back onto the bus, unfortunately he misjudged how highthe roof was and smashed his head straight into making a very large “THUD” as he did so, I think the bus rocked for a few seconds from the impact of it all. Now some people stopped a few seconds to wonder whether they should be laughing or be concerned for our Friend’s health.. Aimee and I by passed the whole thought process and just burst out laughing and were almost on the floor, I think it became painful to breathe at one stage. For the record he was fine, but apparently now has some scars to show for his massive collision. We are still unsure on the exact damage to the bus.

After dropping Craig off, we decided that we needed to stop for some dinner. So we pulled into a local McDonalds (the Unofficial ‘restaurant’ for Raiders Army away game travels) and sat down to enjoy a nice feed, it had been a while since our last away win so it was definitely a nice change to be able to talk about Victory over dinner.

After a quick refuel of petrol we were off again, because there was no CD player we had to make up and sing our own songs. With a creative mind you can sing about pretty much anything, I just wish I could remember more of the songs that were brought out that night on that trip home..

Fortunately we were able to negotiate a drop of point at the Dickson Tradies, this turned out to be a logical choice as only about 3 people were actually returning to QBN.. Why on earth that was going to be an original drop off point I will never know.

Next week the Raiders Tackle the Titans up in the Gold Coast, our friends in Queensland will be there and we encourage everyone to join them in the away team section of the ground. The team really appreciates the support away from home and will definitely lift if they see a nice section full of Green.

BELIEVE

- Marko.

Share on Facebook