Raiders vs Cowboys

Ding dong the witch is dead! Finally, the Raiders managed to get the proverbial ‘monkey’ off their backs, and chalk  up our first win in nearly two months. The Army, East Stand and even the Mal Stand all sang up to get the boys over the line for a monumental victory.

The build up to the game started on Friday, with the now tradition pre-match hootenanny taking place at Big Simon’s place. After downing a few sherbets in the hot tub, it was time to get a decent kip for the big day ahead. Unfortunately due to lack of gluten and starch in the household, me and Ben somehow got to that filthy pikey, hash slinger RJ. After being accosted by a 50 year old slapper, who blatantly wanted some candle wick, we decided it was time to move on. We got home so late, Saturday’s paper was already on the driveway. This did bear the brilliant news that Smithy was lining up, we have hope!

Anyway, game day was upon us, and it was onto the usual pre match boozer, the Jammo. Whilst the Youth Firm was nearly in full numbers at the Jammo, a shout out must go to the RAWOF (Raiders Army Werthers Original Firm), who were no where to be seen. Poor old men were probably stuck at home playing Bridge. After a few pig’s ears, it was onto the fortress to see the boys take what we expected to be a hiding of gargantuan proportions.

After watching the reggies do the business over Newtown (again), it was time for the Cowboys. The Army numbers that had turned up for this game, considering how poor the weather was, pleasantly surprised me. Anyway, as the game got underway, it appeared to be running to plan, 12-0 Cowboys. However, as we’ve seen before this season, the team produced an outstanding comeback to go into the break 22-12 up. Needless to say, Smithy was pulling the strings, but everyone else in the team contributed, and at half time we looked good things. The Army performance in the first half was good, with the singing continuing pretty much non stop, “LLLLOOOMMMMUUU”, “Down the pub, drink ten pints, get absolutely plastered, go back home, beat the wife, you dirty Queensland bastard”.

The Cowboys came out rejuvenated after half time, and Paul Bowman crossed for them. The next 25 minutes were an arm wrestle, with the Cowboys dominating possession and having numerous sets on the Raiders try line. This is where both the players, Army and rest of the Canberra crowd stood up and said ‘We’re not going to accept another loss, this is our game’. Every Raiders players was magnificent, with our defence winning the game. The Army was magnificent, and what we lacked in numbers, we made up in passion. The singing in the last 20 minutes was virtually non-stop, with the rallying call ‘Let’s get the f*cking greens over the line’ galvanising the Army in a display of singing that left the vast majority breathless and voiceless. What was also good to see was the East Stand, and God forbid, the Mal Stand really give it a crack in the last 20 minutes. It’s games like these where you see only real Raiders fans turn up, and every one of them deserves to be congratulated.

After a few beers at the post match, it was into town to celebrate what seems our first win in an eternity. We were quite surprised to see the majority of the Cowboys squad having a tiddly wink at the fine establishment that is Mooseheads. It’s not everyday that you see Australian and Queensland representatives frequenting that cesspit. After the power hour had finished, and one of our members tested the bouncebackability of Mooseheads glass jugs, we moved onto North Bar. Firstly, North resembled a Swedish sauna. It was so hot in there I was sweating like a paedophile in a playground, or as Woody noted he was sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop. After congratulating a few of the boys on the outstanding victory, we decided it was time to jog on to the new and improved (haha) Insomnia.

Whilst the décor in Insomnia may have changed, the clientele hasn’t. We were having a great time watching disco biscuit fuelled bell-ends make wankers of themselves. However, our gaze was diverted to the hideous dance moves of one of the Army members who had accompanied us. He looked like a combination of a frog in a blender and Elaine Benniss. After having a giraffe or two, we decided it was time to head home and call it a night. The taxi trip home gave us the chance to reminisce about what an incredible day it had been, just another chapter in the life of a Raider’s fan. Expect the unexepected.

Next week we take on Penwiff Pamfers at home base, in a game which we are expected to win. This game will in no way be easy, with Penny having the honour of donating the other toothless mob their first two points of the year. The toothless hordes will be hitching a ride down to the game, so it is crucial that we have as many as possible with the Army. If you haven’t sat with us before, now is this time. Now is the time to show that there’s only one real team in Canberra. Now is the time to be loud and proud. Now is the time to give the boys the support that can change matches. Now is the time to BELIEVE - Ultra